If you were perfect, I wouldn't have to complain

I'm going to find another you

2008-05-13T16:56:00.002-04:00

Dear Blogger,
It's over. I'm sorry. I tried to work it out, but you're just stuck in your old ways. I need someone new, who is refreshing, ready for life and loves me for who I am. I am not so easily defined in this little box you have here. I need space. And the truth is, I'm seeing someone else. Ya, I'm sorry. He's a little smarter than you and yea, he's younger than you, but everyone loves a cougar. So I'm moving out and leaving my stuff with you. If you really love me, you'll want to stay updated on what I'm doing now. Usually, I wouldn't encourage you to stalk me, but I think we can stay friends, don't you? So look me up here
Blogger, I loved you so, but somethings aren't meant to be.
<3 Robin

Random musings of my day as I procrastinate studying for exams

2008-05-04T13:40:00.003-04:00

I just remembered today that doctors told me when I was a kid that I was going to be 5'9'' and a mathematical genius. When I topped out at 5'3'' in 8th grade and I barely made it through algebra 2 junior year, I knew I had been lied to.

Has anyone seen the commercial with Noah Wiley about the polar bears? It's the real life, even more depressing version of the "Inconvenient Truth" polar bear scene. Both of which almost made me cry. Damn you, polar bears.

So, I Googled myself and found this Asian guy talking about the first sweater I made for KnitScene
I also finally joined Raverly (I'm going to geek on all of you about knitting for a second) which is this website that allows people who knit to post the projects they are working on, along with their progress and pictures. So, narcissistic me looked to see if anyone was making my designs and sure enough about 15 people were. It's really cool knowing people out there are making and enjoying the stuff I designed. The sweaters I sat frantically knitting to meet deadline, the sweaters I called my mom in rage when I botched the front and back with too many dropped stitches and the sweaters that ended up costing me money to the IRS, are now being worn by people all over the country.

I am convinced that living on the third floor of University Suites is deadly. Stock and I, who share a wall on the third floor, have spent this entire semester sick. I am now ending the semester from Hell with a lovely case of tonsillitis. I've been having trouble with my vocal chords for the past two months, so when I woke up Friday morning with the part of my throat hurting that has been for awhile, I thought nothing of it. When I nearly fell asleep on the bench at Old Navy waiting for Kathryn and woke up the next morning unable to speak, I knew it was much more than my vocal chords. So I spent yesterday in bed vacillating between freezing and sweating and unable to eat. But I feel better today thanks to my trusty Z-pak. Go Arithromycin! You should click that link about tonsillitis, there is a graphic picture of what it looks like.

The ECU Prostitution Video:
It's finally finished. A lot of you have been asking about it and as soon as I can get it up online, I will. But here's a fun tale until then. Stefanie and I spent about 10 hours filming and maybe 10 hours editing for a 4 minute and 44 second film (we're clearly mediocre at Final Cut Pro). We finished a day ahead of schedule. We logged it on our tape, ready to turn it in. We watched it that night to make sure it looked good. We almost threw up when the video was just a blue screen. We had one day to make this work. I assumed that maybe we just had some settings wrong. I went to the editing lab to find out that half of my files were missing. Shit. I finally was able to get on the computer that we edited it on and luckily the files showed up there. But then it wouldn't write to tape. Then I couldn't add back in stuff that I needed to add. Then files that I needed rendered, wouldn't render. I sat there for an hour and a half staring at the screen, moments away from a mental break down, watching my G.P.A. crumble because this project is worth 25% of your grade. And then, by no means by my ability to properly use Final Cut Pro, everything worked out right there with 5 minutes before the editing lab closed. I left with a horrible headache, needing a strong drink and a new found hatred for Final Cut Pro. In all actuality, I wish it hadn't taken me until the end of my junior year to realize that I really like doing all this (even though I'm really bad at it).

Is anyone capable of drinking from a Nalgene bottle without spilling it all over themselves? I'm sure as hell not.

Obama Goes to College

2008-04-21T11:36:00.007-04:00

So for those of you who don't go to ECU or do and live under a rock, presidential candidate Barack Obama came and spoke at Minges Coliseum last Thursday. Clearly my lateness in blogging about this speaks highly of my ability to be a journalist.

The Obama Adventure started at 2:20 on Thursday, when Burch and I boarded the packed Minges bus in hopes of getting there early enough to be let in. Doors didn't open until four, but by 2:30 the line was already stretching down the parking lot and beginning to curve through the grass. Bowman and Merkle caught up with us ten minutes later and by then the line was snaking its way through the majority of the grassy section. After staking our places in line, Burch and I ran off to Rite Aid to stock up on Goldfish, water, beef jerky and gummy worms. We had hours of waiting ahead of us; we couldn't be famished and sitting in the sun. When we returned around 3:30, Ellis had joined us and the entire field was trampled. We were told that only 500 people were going to be let in, but there were already over a thousand people here. We all tried to guess the amount people who showed up, but none of us were very good at that jelly beans in the jar game.

The line began moving a little before four and by 4:15 we were sitting in the cramped seats of the Williams Arena. We were sandwiched between six annoying frat guys, a guy who had a striking resemblance to Louie Anderson, various Pitt County residents and some perturbed ECU students. And there we sat and sat; there was another two hour wait until anything would be happening. Ellis pretended to be doing Buddhism homework, while laughing at the ridiculous material I was putting on note cards for my merchandising final (it consisted of information on mannequins), Burch napped on Bowman's shoulder and Merkle grew increasingly aggravated as the frat boys behind us played a game called "Is this a cell phone?" for five minutes straight. The fear of not being able to get in was expunged when we realized everyone got in and then some. All in all, if I had to guess, there were probably 3,000 people there.

Finally, after our two hour wait, a big, boisterous, black woman emerged on the stage and everyone erupted in applause--for no one knew that we were in for several speeches that evening. Out of all the speeches, hers was the most memorable. The continuous mention of "Doctor BarackA Obama" certainly caused explosions of laughter and even more cheers when she finally pronounced it correctly. A line that stuck out the most for me was, "we welcome him with our hospitable hospitality." Her southern draw let the words fall out of her mouth one slow syllable at a time and the poor articulation caused her credibility to fall on deaf ears. The speakers to follow were an array men with political affiliations (my vagueness also lends itself to my ability to be a journalist), who spout out lines about turning our state "blue." Intermittently, to waste time, campaign helpers would run out throwing Obama "A change to believe in"posters to ECU students, who eagerly flung forward to grab one so they could hang it side by side with their beer posters at home.

Finally, after agonizingly boring speeches by politicians and campaign supporters that I had no interest in, Barack came out. Everyone stood and cheered, people on the floor lurched forward to be able to shake his hand and one girl cried as she waved her Obama book back and forth. Obama took the stage and out came the speech he had obviously rattled off numerous times before.

Now a few points on his speech...
I liked his proposal on allotting a 4,00o dollar stipend each year to college students to pay for college, although I'm not really one for community service. I liked that he wants to start pulling us out of Iraq. I liked that he wants to improve our infrastructure and create more jobs. I even liked his goals of improving health care, although they were lofty and I don't think they are obtainable. I didn't like the obvious use of persuasion in his speech. OK, he's here for one reason to win our votes--it's supposed to be persuasive, but his use of saying "that's why I need to be the next president of the United States," was excessive. Of course everyone cheered and applauded every time he said that, but I found it unnecessary. I found his quote of "I will stop global warming," a bit ridiculous. I'm all for reducing global warming, but you sir, can not stop it. His use of the word "they" instead of "we" when referring to working class people, really weakened his case. Using the fact that Bush will no longer be in office as a selling tool was also a weak point. Whether he is there or not, Bush won't be. Lastly, the ever persistent reference to 9/11 on any candidates point, really has to go. And is it at all possible for a presidential candidate to not use a Bruce Springsteen song as their campaign song?

Obama spoke for about 45 minutes and was far more eloquent then any of the speakers that preceded him. He knew what trigger words to say to really excite the crowd and knew what issues the people in attendance would want to hear. Despite some facets, I was impressed and was glad I went. At the speeches end, the five us pushed our way out of the stadium and were met with a giant smoke cloud seething up into the Greenville night air. (A 100 year old tobacco factory caught on fire.) We ran through the Pirates Place complex and through the grassy field that runs parallel to Evans to find our way home. As the thoughts of the imminent Mexican food
ran through our minds, the dangerous "lime snatch" crawled up our legs.

I am neither a Obama supporter or hater. I am a registered libertarian and if voting for Green wasn't a complete waste of a vote, I would do it. The next best bet is Democrat and so there for, when Obama tears Hilary apart in the Primaries, I will vote for him. I have no support in me for McCain though. I for one am sick of the Religious Right, conservative nut jobs. He wants to keep us in Iraq even if it takes a hundred years, he likes to play up his P.O.W. story as a selling point, he too believes in the ridiculousness of the "sanctity of marriage", he wants to spend more money on defense but thinks we're putting too much money into the arts, and he even considered having Condi as his VP. If he became president and Condi actually was his VP, I'd move to Canada.

Top Ten Things Junior Year Taught Me

2008-04-20T22:05:00.003-04:00

Since this year is only one week from ending--thank god--I am going to recreate this blog post. It took me a week to write this and not because it is extremely well written or funny. I just had a really hard time thinking of things I learned, kind of sad.

1. Tequila gets you into trouble:
Burch and I both experienced a night together last semester that we coined as "the worst night of our lives," for very separate reasons, but it will haunt us for a long time and tequila was entirely to blame. Tequila makes me yell at grad students for some reason. Tequila makes me send text messages that I should not send. Tequila makes me dance when we go downtown (that's a terrible idea). Tequila makes me have pow wows in bathrooms at parties and confess things I shouldn't. Tequila has never made me do anything I'm proud of and yet, I continue to drink it on a regular basis. I love you, Jose.

2. Friends with benefits does not work:
I already knew this. And yet, I thought it would be a good idea to prove this to myself two more times. Also, don't give speeches about it. Those 120 people who heard it are going to find you on campus, on the bus or downtown. I can't tell you how many times I have been met with someone saying, "You're the girl who gave...." Yeah, that's me. I regret it, please leave me alone. How in the hell do you remember me? It was months ago, let's all just forget it ever happened. And no, that doesn't mean I want to have sex with you, but that's really cute. I guess you lose your dignity and all respect when you admit to things of that nature. Never again.

3. Living in University Suites can be titillating:
At least once a week, I hear gun shots and sirens as I'm falling asleep. It keeps things interesting, to say the least. When all the worst drivers aren't on Greenville Boulevard, they are driving in our complex. With the warm weather comes the roaches. Lots of them. They make for lovely decorative items on our linoleum floor. The neighbors you don't know will steal your pong table. The train will vibrate your bed, while the garbage men shake the giant dumpsters and the yard guys mow the grass at 7 a.m. You will hear when your neighbors and roommates have sex (we were probably already listening...I mean, what?). And lastly, if you live on the third floor, you will sweat the entire winter, while the person on the first floor freezes. In the summer it is the exact opposite. But this place is a godsend after a year at University Manor, so I'll take the roaches, sweating and bed vibrations.

4. PJ doesn't smell even after five months:
We threw a Halloween party this year and made about 18 gallons of PJ and we were left with at least six gallons afterwards. So we spent the next five days drinking the remainders and it still wasn't gone. After a total of six days of PJ, you get kind of sick of it and the fruit starts to taste really bad, so instead of dumping it out, we just put the lid back on the container we made it in and stuck it on the porch. Thanksgiving, Christmas and Valentine's Day came and went. Finally, when we had to go buy a new container to make Whamboozie for my birthday, we looked out at the porch and remembered we still had PJ from Halloween. I opened it and mold hadn't formed and it looked the same as it had the day we threw it out there. So I totally drank it and got wasted. Kidding, we threw it out, finally. But I was surprised to not be greeted with some new strand of fungus.

5. Don't attack Jewish boys in bars:
This past fall, I made a trip up to UNC to see Mattie, Justin and Badders. I decided to make it a tequila night (see side effects above) and we decided to go to Yeats. (I'm OK with Yeats. However, when we had gone there before some guy had tried to convince me that he and his friend had been on Legends of the Hidden temple. When he failed to tell me that the giant rock's name was Omeck, I knew he was lying.) I ended up drinking entirely too much tequila before we even left. When we got downtown, the first thing I did was harass two guys wearing crushed velvet jackets. Then Drew bargained his way in for us and once we got in, Morgan and I went and sat in an out cove, where much to our surprise was a guy wearing a yarmulke. Morgan looked over and said, "Look, there's a jew for you." I became estatic. I jumped up, knocked over this entire table of drinks these people were drinking and sat right next to him. I then badgered him all about his jew-ness for about 10 minutes. Every word that came out of my mouth, he inched closer and closer to the wall. He told me his name was Mordecai, but I'm calling bullshit. However, he was orthodox and I kept confusing their traditions with hasidic Jews and then profusely apologized after asking where his payes and fur trimmed hat were. He escaped shortly thereafter. When we left for the night, Ellis and I ran up Franklin Street screaming, "Fuck the Tarheels, ARGGHH" at anyone who passed by us, including 40 year old joggers. It was a great night, but I guess Jewish boys aren't looking to be attacked by shiksas who pretend to be Jewish. BAH!

6. I am never having a child:
As a nursing student, Stock spent this semester working with babies, preg women, and pre/post natal schenenigans. She of course would come back and report what she had seen that day to us. I will spare you all the gruesome details that come with child birth and pregnancy, but it is not for me. I spent countless hours gasping and holding my hand over my mouth trying not to vomit from all the horror stories of vag expansion, table shitting and mysterious goo. If schools want to prevent teen pregnancy, they just need to start giving details of it all. I want to go get my tubes tied right now. If I mistakenly get pregnant and don't "zap" it (mildly offensive? no.), I just want to be put into a coma until it is all over.

7. The flu is very fun:
Every year when people asked if I had gotten my flu shot I would say, "No, but I've never gotten the flu shot and I've never gotten the flu. So I'm good." Not this year my friends. It was a 21st birthday present for me. And let me just say after a week of more Law and Order SUV then anyone should watch and multiple packets of hot dogs, I was 8 pounds heavier and less of a person. It was hands down one of the worst weeks of my life. But I'm still not getting my flu shot, I mean, it worked the other twenty years of my life. Plus, I bet I'll be craving some hot dogs and rape cases come next February anyway.

8. Tanning beds: they're still gross:
I have refused to go to tanning beds my entire life. I didn't like the idea of baking in a box, having a lovely orange glow and the fact that my entire family has been plagued with skin cancer. I even ridiculed all of my friends who went to them. And then one day back in February I became a hypocrite. You see, I bought this red dress for my birthday. You can't be pale and wear red. It doesn't work. So I figured that since our complex offers free tanning, I would just go a few times. The first time wasn't too bad. Hell, it was almost relaxing. The next time I got over zealous and went a few minutes too long. Eh, nothing a two day break can't fix. The third time I emerged red, burned, covered in bulb lines, pissed and even more convinced that tanning beds are indeed gross. The lines and burn faded in time for my birthday, but I was greatly scarred by my moment of hypocrisy. I now turn to a five dollar bottle of Vaseline sunless tanner and it works just fine. And maybe some days I am orange, but it goes well with my hair.

9. Suddenly Single Slut Syndrome:
Contributed by Mattie, but I agree. It exists, grabs a hold, is the reason for #2 and always ends badly. We all have to do it sometime, right? (humor me?) You live, you learn (insert Alanis Morissette lyrics here) and we all came out OK. Next topic...

10. FINALLY: I enjoy ECU football games and am willing to drink beer:
I missed freshmen year football season because I was at UNC-G, but I still made it to the ECU homecoming game. However, I left at halftime. Sophomore year, I didn't go to any games. I usually went home on game day weekends. I couldn't care less if we won or lost. This year the first game we went to I was bored and sat there and complained (shro style, of course). After that game, I snuck my way into the Pirate Club Section and never looked back. When the girls wanted to leave early, I would try to find someone else who wanted to stay the rest of the game with me. ZB and I dance all across the bleachers and I even yell inappropriate things. For senior year, I'm actually going to buy a Pirate Club pass and look forward to playing the Snatch association game all over again. As for the beer...this is ground breaking. In high school, J. flare taught me how to drink with vodka and everclear. I never saw beer as a possibility; I thought it tasted disgusting. When I left for college, everyone told me I would start drinking beer. It didn't happen and I held strong to my penchant for liquor. It wasn't until a few weeks ago that I finally gave in. I got sick of seeing everyone getting bottles of beer at 519 for a dollar, when I had to shell out atleast four for a measly cranberry vodka. I realize me drinking beer is kind of like, "what's the big fucking deal?" But believe me, the reactions I've already gotten from my friends, speak loudly to the fact that it is kind of a big fucking deal. Kind of like me. ;)

I wonder what I'll learn next year...

THAT GUY-the universally known and hated guy

2008-04-14T00:19:00.004-04:00

I found this as I was going through some old Word documents. I wrote this last spring for my Creative Non-Fiction class. We got to write a rant as our first assignment and we had a "that guy" in that class, so it was dedicated to him. Wherever you are Todd, you were crazy and I hope you have finally figured out what a "scene" is, because you certainly caused a lot of them.

“You know, I think the meaning of this film lies within gravity itself.” What? What did you just say? Did that even make sense? No! No, it certainly did not. And why is that? Because you’re THAT GUY. Sitting there in every college class ever taken, ten rows back and slightly out of view, is the boy everyone hates.

Every class period, THAT GUY will stroll in several minutes late, dressed in a way he believes impresses the class, when in reality no one cares. Then only seconds later, when he realizes that we are discussing our recent reading assignment or written assignment, will he feel the need to contribute how he felt about it. It will be long and drawn out, chalk full of pompous remarks and most of all the ever so blatant truth that he has no idea what the assignment was about.

You see, there is a difference between a slacker who is merely bullshitting his way through class and the kid labeled as THAT GUY. THAT GUY is actually unintelligent, but unlike most unintelligent people, he thinks he is inspiring, intuitive even, and most of all far more competent than any other class mate, when he is none of those things. THAT GUY is a guy who doesn’t make good grades, but wants everyone to think he does. He’s a guy who wants people to think he is held in the highest regard and that every girl wants him, but really the only girl he ever had sex with was the fat chick in his algebra class his senior year in high school.

THAT GUY will take every opportunity to open his mouth and boast about a past achievement that he feels makes his worthy of everyone’s respect and admiration. But the fascinating truth behind the lives of all those THAT GUYS out there is that their life is pathetic, lonely and most of all wrapped in the illusion of success and acuity.

To all the THAT GUYS out there, I hate you; everyone hates you. Your persistence to appear more than you are is dismaying. More people might like you, you might be seen as a decent human being, and you might even be able to learn something, if for just a second you could shut your mouth.

All those mocha lattes, you gotta do Pilates

2008-04-09T21:14:00.008-04:00

I was reading the East Carolinian last week, which although has greatly improved since last year, is still a very shitty university paper. There are a lot of articles that you can tell they just ran because the deadline came and nothing else worthy of being printed came about. But regardless of the impressive amount of spelling and grammatical errors, poorly checked sources, and pointless articles, I read it every Tuesday and Thursday (and not just for the Pirate Rants.)
I read it online and I'm the one always leaving lengthy comments complimenting them on their faulty logic and mediocre attempts at writing anything with journalistic value, aren't I sweet? So, why don't I write for the paper? Because I refuse to be associated with such a terrible publication. If this were The Daily Tarheel, then I would be all about it

Anyway, this has absolutely nothing to do with my rant. I was reading an article last week about girls at the gym and I got excited. I hoped it would call out all those obnoxious girls sitting on weight machines and chatting on their phones, the girls who walk slowly on the inside of the track, the girls who instead of working out are just watching the guys play basketball, or even the girls who strap themselves to the ellipticals for hours, not knowing that ellipticals won't do a thing for their waistline--but none was to be found in this article. Instead, it focused on the fact that girls are scared of the weight room and ways to go about getting them in there. It was preposterous. When I finished reading this article, I knew I had just ruined another bowl of oatmeal with mindless TEC drabble.

First and foremost, I have never heard of a girl being afraid of the weight room. Was the writer referring to the entire first floor that has free weights, weight machines, ellipticals and treadMEALS? Or just the area with free weights? Either way, there are girls in weight machine, etc., area. Granted, they are just sitting there, making sure their make up hasn't smeared from that one drop of sweat that formed while rehashing their entire weekend to their friend on the phone (as they take up a machine of course), but they are in there.

In the free weight area, yeah you don't see girls, but I don't think it is because they are afraid. The article reasoned it was because they were afraid the guys were going to look at them. No one is looking at anyone, they are all too fixated on their bulging muscles and the fact that their shirt with the ridiculously large armholes-that they cut themselves-is hanging on by a thread. At least I have never been checked out while getting my arms deiseled up with those rocking ten pounders. But that could be because by this time my hair is frizzing off the top of my head, my make up has smeared and I'm the sweaty mess that's bicep curling to Thriller. (grunting to myself about how I need to get jacked and tan, sorry that shit isn't funny anymore, at all.) I mean, I would check me out and I do--I narcissistically stare at myself in the mirror all Kevin Spacey-esque in American Beauty. Mmm.

To the point..
Hey, I'm all for you getting your fat ass into shape. If the gym was packed because people were actually working out and concerned about their health, then I wouldn't mind waiting for a machine or treadmill, but that's never the case. So I'm gonna talk about what the TEC forgot to mention.

Enter the typical girl at the REC center: Full face of make-up that clearly isn't just left from what she had on during the day, skimpy shorts w/ a ripped wife beater, and shoes that were not made to work out in. She struts in with her other moronic friends, they scan all the elliptical time sheets to see if anything is open and of course there isn't because for some reason girls love the ellipticals. (I once loved the elliptical too, because it was an easy way to avoid actually running. Then when I moved to shithole U. Manor and they had broken ellipticals, I learned running actually helps you lose weight, who knew? ) They resort to walking around the track and gossip with each other, while taking up the 3 lanes, forcing everyone else to run around them. Finally, after two solid laps (a third of a mile), they retire to the weight room, where they perch upon what I call the sex machines or leg presses and inspect their nail beds, split ends and to see if their tits look good. They leave after having lengthy discussions about Coldstone and undoubtedly rolled up there and got the "Gotta Have It" size and talked about how they really need to start going to the gym more often.

Of course, this is an over exaggeration, there are a decent amount of girls who are working out, some who probably should stop working out and eat a hamburger, but none the less, aren't wasting space. However, in the one to two hours I spend there a day, I see between 5 and 10 of these gym flies, who do nothing but provide me much entertainment and great aggravation.

Now for the guys...
I can't say much about them because besides that half of them look like they have injected too many steroids, they are indeed working out. So, I'll say what I can. I don't get the ripped shirt trend. You took your t-shirt and then ripped from the armpit to about three inches from the bottom seam on the side, so it almost functions as one of those reflector vests you can wear. It's not a shirt at this point, just something that's draped over your shoulders and stained wife beater. I don't get it. And lastly, why must you grunt? Half of the time it's the guys who don't know what they are doing and are maxing out every time, so they grunt through the pain. And I just laugh, because you're the guy who pretends like they're really bad ass and are working out hard. I would come over and tell you that maxing out is bad idea and you're destroying your muscles, but taking directions from a girl at the gym is emasculating, so I'll just snicker to myself as Jitterbug plays loudly in my ears.

Shro, out!

I dedicate this blog post to Anthony. He used to be this blog's biggest fan back in the day and now that I've started it again, it's just not the same without all of the sexually innuendo filled comments he would leave. He came up with a lot of the ideas for the old posts, ignited my bitchiness and always told me to keep writing. We all miss you :( RIP.

I'm gonna dress you up in my love, in my love.

2008-04-06T19:06:00.004-04:00

This one is going to be extra, extra, extra bitchy...so you've been forewarned.

It's now officially April and in Greenville that means two things: The rain won't subside until May and girls all across campus will finally take off their sweatpants and attempt to dress themselves. I figured now more than ever would be a good time to post my annual bitchy fashion post.

Ladies, there are some things we need to discuss...

First off, I understand you're excited to bust out your mini skirts again (which will be discussed later), but pairing them with your Ugg boots because it isn't completely warm enough yet, isn't okay. I'm not sure if you realized, but those two represent different seasons. And I'm fairly certain that if it's warm enough to put on a mini skirt, we won't be seeing snow fall. So put them back in your closet until next fall! Same goes with wearing Uggs with dresses and shorts (especially cheerleading shorts--what the fuck, people?).

The issue of leggings...
Hi, leggings aren't pants. I'm not really interested in seeing your camel toe as I haul ass to Joyner East. Leggings in general are awful and that "trend" has long since passed, but if you still insist on wearing them, put on a dress or skirt please.

Last time I checked shirts were shirts and dresses were dresses, the two weren't interchangeable. (Well, I guess you can wear a dress as a shirt, but not vice versa.)
I get it, you're going downtown and TOTES are going to take like 10 tequila shots, hump all over some dumb frat guy, spill your drink on some bystander, scream for no reason, and just be like so totally awesome. But what are you wearing? As much as I appreciate your attempt to do something different, that tube top you stretched down over you ass is really unattractive and quite frankly giving me a show I didn't pay for. But, I'm sure that tool you're dancing with, who has now pulled your dress up to your waist, really likes it and that's what matters.

Muffin Top City!
I know, you're in denial about the weight you gained over Christmas break and never let go of, but sweetheart don't punish your pants just because you couldn't resist that extra Krispy Kreme Donut. Know your pant size and wear it! You know how I know you're pretending your skinnier than you are? Well, that giant muffin top that has formed above your jeans kind of gives it away. When you wear jeans that don't fit you, you actually look fatter and extremely disproportional. Not to mention, it's severely uncomfortable. I was there once too (too many desserts in the dinning hall Freshmen year) and the whole time you're in class you have to keep adjusting them so you can breathe. So do your waist, your pants and your overall appearance a big favor and buy the right sized pants. K, thanks.

I am confused by this one.
Bulky jewelry with bulky jewelry. Forever 21 finally opened in Raleigh and all the jewelry is $6.50, so time to stock up, but dear God don't wear them all on the same day. You can not wear huge earrings with a huge necklace. I really thought that was commonsense, but every day I see a lot of girls wearing just that. You see, it's a weight balance kind of thing. When you pair them together, you put all your weight at your neck, everything else becomes invisible and you appear top heavy. Balance it out, yo!

Mini Skirts!
Kathryn squared already disagreed with me on this, but I stand by it. Mini skirts are geared at teenagers, so if you're over the age of twenty it's time to give yours away. (Haven't you noticed they are only sold at AE, Aero, A&F & Hollister--all stores targeted at a younger demographic) But if you want to look sixteen, by all means keep wearing them and even better, don't wear underwear.

Skinny Jeans!
Unless you look like Kathryn Ellis, you should not be wearing skinny jeans--especially if you have a huge ass. You need to have long, SKINNY legs to wear them, otherwise you look like a lollipop. And the "I think I'm the bitch from Rilo Kiley" look is really working for you, you should all keep that up.

And finally to end with a little comment on hair...
Why is your hair bleached blond on the top and fake black on the bottom? Why? Where in your brain did you think that that look would be becoming on you? For riz, what the hell? I mean, hair naturally looks like that all the time, so what an obvious dye job to get. Next time you go back to your hair dresser, punch them in the face for letting them do that to your hair. Any decent hair dresser would talk you out doing something that awful. Nothing looks cooler than when you have your hair in a ponytail and running perpendicular to your head is the stark contrast of fake, fake, fake hair. So hot! I'm doing that next time I dye my hair.

I hope you enjoyed my bitching and that it makes you think twice about your wardrobe decisions! I thought writing about fashion would be a better idea than actually studying for my merchandising test and doing merchandising homework. By all means, if anyone actually reads this and you have some sort of defense for one the above topics, I would love to hear it, comment away! (no one is going to comment.)

Bragging Rights

2008-03-31T19:23:00.004-04:00

On this very day 2 years ago I posted a rant called "Shit man, I am sooo drunk!" The rant basically dealt with the issue of boys who count their beers (so cool) and I decided it needed to be revisited again.

My new detox diet doesn't allow for complete alcoholic binge fests anymore (my attempt to regain some level of dignity), so I have spent the past few weekends sober or atleast...mostly sober. I've noticed though that it appears that none of us have grown up. Two years ago, I bitched that guys defined their manliness through telling everyone how many beers they drank and it they are still doing it.

This past weekend Burch was approached by some guy who told her, "Man, I just had SEVEN beers and I even pre-gamed!" Burch pulled her best bitch card and spoke to him way over his head and then sufficiently humored him..."No way, that's crazy! Can you even see right now?"

One time Burch and I tagged team this guy who was bragging to us about his beer consumption. "You guys have no idea. I just had 18 beers! I've been drinking ALL night." We told him only real men count their beers and we were really impressed. He must be a real bad ass. He didn't get that we were making fun of him, but I suppose that's what happens when you're "SOOO DRUNK!"

Two years later and I still don't get it. Is there really a girl out there that is impressed by some guy who pounds down 20 cans of shitty Busch Light? (Damn Johnny, you're the best beer drinker here. You wanna go fuck?) It's not happening fellas. Wanting to glamorize your night because you spent it playing Halo with your brahs because you couldn't get any "play," shouldn't be done through bragging about those brewskies you totally crushed. If you're gonna lie or brag about asinine things, at least make it entertaining. "She totally wanted me and wouldn't stop hanging all over me. I'm gonna send her a facebook poke later, for sure. She wanted it, needed it, even." I mean...I'm still gonna stand there, nod away like I'm listening and am really impressed and then give you the "wow, that's so cool" eyebrow lift, but at least you were a little less generic. (kind of...not really). But don't you worry, your entire speech will be repeated the next morning during the Bo's Weekend Recap Vag Fest and then at least four other girls will think you're "cool" then too.

Why don't you put your big boys pants on, belt included, and realize no one cares. If you're the one who drank two beers and needs to sit down, the kid puking in the bathroom from the fifty second keg stand, the dude embarrassing himself by hitting on a "total ten" or the guy drinking O'Doul's, I DON"T CARE! I'M NOT IMPRESSED! I DON'T THINK YOU HAVE MASSIVE BALLS! I DON'T WANT TO FUCK YOU! Instead, inside is ever growing feeling of pity for you and the fact that your ego must be so bruised that you have to tell some stranger that you have a drinking problem (two hands and only one mouth! BAHHH HILARIOUS!) Can I graduate yet?

You're a few years overdue, I spent them waiting here for you

2008-03-30T14:09:00.008-04:00

(This post isn’t a rant, but involves me making fun of myself a lot. If you were around for my “emo” days, you may really like it.)

This weekend I ended up at the Brewery to see some guy's band play. The guy that we had only met 2 hours prior at “Sausage Fest” asked Andrea and I to come and we only obliged after he agreed to guest listing us. In the end, they weren't too bad and are apparently playing at Barefoot this year.

In ninth and tenth grade, I spent all of my weekends at the Brewery, Duke Coffee House, Cats Cradle, Unity Church, and other small venues all in hopes of hanging out with a guy in the band I was currently trying to be a groupie for. I had the emo track jacket over the perfectly picked thrift store t-shirt, the ballet flats, the short pixie hair dyed that awful shade of red or very blond, and the attitude that I really cared about all of this music scene stuff (if my computer hadn't crashed junior year and lost all my pictures, I would post a fun picture of my lameness. However, I didn't shop at Hot Topic, so heaven forbid you confuse me with that crowd). My friends and I would roll up with our messenger bags, beaded bracelets and the best head nod we could muster while the bands played. It was all a really cute facade of some girl I thought I wanted to be and I thought the band boys would like. But thankfully, I never had any luck in that department.

Come junior year, I started hanging out with other people, dropped the wannabe emo look and quickly grabbed onto the ever-fleeting mod fad. God, I was cool. And as far as I can remember, I didn't return to any local band shows until recently.

So this was my first visit to the Brewery in over 5 years and this time it was much more empty and less smoky, but still as dirty as I remembered it. As I sat pretentiously drinking my tequila sunrise in my out-of-place cotton, belted dress, I couldn't help but remember how excited I used to get about it all. "OH EM GEE, we're gonna see (fill in the blank) tonight! Maybe we can hang out with them afterwards." We never did and instead I just looked like a twelve-year-old running around in four-inch heels trying to dodge the smoke and get some sweaty guy's attention.

While I explained the evidenced wonders of "the book" to Andrea and waited for the band to play, four girls dressed in silk bubble dresses, four-inch heels, giant clutches, and fancy up-do's waltzed in with a familiar air of excitement surrounding them. They all giggled as the boys in the bands walked by and when one of their friends returned with a beer she had bought with her fake. Oh EM Gee, guys! I couldn't stop laughing as I heard their loud squeals echoing across the room, because that was TOTES me six years ago, except they looked a lot cuter. They tried to dance along to the songs; all encircled each other while erupting in giggle fests and looked around to see if any of the band guys were noticing. It was vomit inducing adorable. And in the end, they were there to see the same guy who had invited us, but their agenda was much more obvious.

After the band’s set finished, we stuck around for another band to play and then I left knowing my local band show days were long gone. I had to get to the real rockin' out sesh anyway--Rock Band at Josh's.

Those years were fun though: stressed ear drums, smoky smelling clothes, ridiculous cover charges, getting picked up in mini-vans, and band pins all blanketed in the over-exaggerated lust for some guy who didn't know I existed.

And what have I learned since then: I don't date boys in bands (unless they are Steve Perry), beaded bracelets aren’t cute, my feet look funny in ballet flats (give me five-inch heels, please), short hair does not work on me, the Brewery makes shitty, over-priced drinks (who doesn’t have the right ingredients to make a cosmo?) don’t stalk or chase guys, but more importantly, don’t stalk or chase guys who don’t know you’re alive.

(On a complete side note: I lieu of reminiscing, I went and downloaded a lot of Thursday, Saves the Day, Juliana Theory, Jimmy Eat World, Death Cab, Ryan Adams, Get up Kids, One Amazin' Kid and The Smiths and it has been quite enjoyable. I forgot how much I used to like all of them. )

Adventures in ECU Healthcare Systems

2008-03-28T11:23:00.005-04:00

Anyone who knows me, knows that I have spent about 25% of my life sick and hopped up on all sorts of antibiotics. From chronic ear infections and sinus infections as a kid to bronchitis, pneumonia, two hardcore mono episodes, 4 sinus infections a year, and all sorts of fun things now that I won't mention; I am always sick.

Considering I don't smoke anything, work out 6 days a week, rarely eat fast food or drink soda, sleep 8 hours a night, take vitamins, and am not a complete and raging alcoholic (yet), I can't really explain why I'm always sick.

Since February 12th, I have been sick. Sometimes it was painfully obvious and like right now for instance, you can't really tell. However, it is there, it's been lingering and it isn't going away. Back in February, I rolled up to the ECU Student Health Center armed with lies Stock told me to tell to make my sinus infection sound worse than it was, because there was no way I was going to be sick for my birthday. After I put on the phelgmy-iest show I could, they said I hadn't been sick long enough to get medicine and told me to take Mucinex. I retorted that if they didn't take care of this now, it would be come full blown, turn into something worse, morph into bronchitis and end with me having pneumonia and wanting to die. They assured me this wasn't the case; I knew differently and off I went Mucinex in hand and slightly perturbed.

February 17th, my birthday, I was home and had the flu set in, along with having my sinus infection graciously kicking it up a notch. I went to my doctor, who gave me drugs and said ECU should have treated it last week. A week went by, the flu subsided and the sinus infection went away. Now, I was just coughing up my lungs and completely congested, so back to the ECU Student Health Center.

I went in there told them their ineptitude to treat me properly lead to this and said I wanted cough syrup with codeine and a Z-pak. They said, "No, you're fine. Take Mucinex D." Great. So I did and it didn't go away. Instead, it became bronchitis (kind of like what I told them from the start). So that next week I went back and told them they screwed up again and now I have bronchitis. This time I heard, "Well, if you have bronchitis there is really no way we can find out (wrong!) and there is nothing we can do to treat it (wrong!). So here's some cough suppressant and more MUCINEX!" I wanted to slap that bitch across the face. You can treat bronchitis with a Z-pak! I would know considering I've had bronchitis at least 4 times.

So now 45 days later and I'm still phlegm city (I know, hot!), I finally returned to my doctor. And what do I have? A sinus infection...still. I finally got prescribed a Z-Pak and she switched all my allergy medicine. You see, if ECU had merely given me a Z-Pak when I bitched the first time, I wouldn't still be sick a month and a half later. Whenever you go in there, instead of asking important questions like, "Are you wheezing (I was...)" "Is the Mucinex helping? (it wasn't)" they ask, "are you practicing safe sex?" I really appreciate the concern for my vagina, but what does that have to do with my sinus infection?

I would think that since Greenville is only really known for its great health care facilities they would do a better job. Instead, they push mucinex and ask me about my drinking and sex habits (they're fine, drug me!). They also like to tell you that you might be pregnant because you've been coughing a lot and have a stomach ache, but I'm pretty sure you have to be getting laid to get pregnant. I mean I could be wrong, I'm just going off of what my fifth grade teacher told me.

So unless you want Mucinex, Plan-B, condoms that expire in April or to be harassed about STD's, I would stay far away from the Student Health Center.

A few questions to be asked:

2008-03-19T00:05:00.010-04:00

Really, how many times will I fall down the stairs until I realize dropping laundry bombs on them is a bad idea?
In case you haven't been to my townhouse, I live on the sauna floor known as the third floor. I get this sweet little landing to myself, where I can look down on everyone who comes in the house and play the fun game of "Pants or No Pants." I also get my own staircase, which has been speckled in liquor, vomit and dirt stains.

Now, seeing as the washer and dryer are on the second floor, it is entirely too much to ask for me to bring my clothes all the way back up to my room. So the roommates and I have come up with a system: drop laundry bombs throughout my staircase; I find it useful. Every morning, I just sift through the piles for what I want to wear and I'm off. But some mornings, the laundry is out to get me. I have fallen down the complete set of stairs at least four times this semester. In a mad dash to catch the bus or to make oatmeal, my tired feet slip on the pair of pants hanging ever so precariously over the step, I begin to lose balance and begin a painful descent down the stairs.

Tuesday morning, I was pretty sure I broke my toe, but it's fine (everyone can relax!). One time, I really smashed my arm and over-extended it at the same time--that one was fun. The other falls have just ended in minor bruises. Every time I see the laundry, I think to myself that I should move it and then I don't until I hurt myself. So really, will I wait until I break my arm to stop throwing it on my steps or even then will I not learn?

On a complete side note: Today, I was running up the outdoor Joyner East stairs and somehow managed to trip and face plant straight into them. So, Tuesday, I fall down the stairs and Thursday I trip up them. Either, my clumsiness is just getting out of hand or stairs really aren't my thing.

What is that smell in my kitchen?
The first step you take into our townhouse greets you with an overwhelming scent of rotten trash. Welcoming, really. Even when we don't have full trash bags hanging in our kitchen, even when the sink is empty and the counters are clean, even when the beer pong table isn't in our house, it still wreaks of garbage.

So sometimes, I like to play "What's that Smell," not nearly as fun as "Pants or No Pants," but still provides some sort of entertainment. I smell the trash bag, the pantry, the fridge, the sink, and the counters and yet nothing has led me to the answer of, what's that smell? My last idea is it could quite possibly be our carpet that has been destroyed during all of our PJ parties and beer pong sessions. And when we get our carpets cleaned in the near future, the problem may be resolved. But until that time, I ask you all to play the rousing game of "What's that Smell?" because maybe you can provide some insight to the foreign stench.

Who are the homeless people in Mendenhall?
I spent an hour in Mendenhall every day my sophomore year, just wasting time in between classes. I'd fall asleep on the leather couches watching the Price is Right (in the time of Bob Barker, not Drew Carey), as Mendenhall employees watched the TV's blaring BET and danced along. I enjoyed my hour long escape that is until they came in.

There were two regulars that came in every day. They sat in front of the TV's playing X-Files or Golden Girls and ate food from their anonymous plastic bags. The ragged old man didn't bother me, he usually joined me in watching the Price is Right and fell asleep before I did. However, I wanted to kill the old woman. She would schluff her slippers across the floor as she walked, rummage loudly through her plastic bag and then precede to making loud smacking noises as she ate.

I had completely forgotten about both of them until I started returning to Mendenhall for lunch and to watch that new, strange Mariah Carey video that is oddly playing every time I come in. As I silently ate my yogart parfait, I heard the familiar smacking and as I slowly looked left, I was met with the oppressive sight of the old woman eating her lunch. And thus, mine was ruined.

I am not completely certain they are homeless, but they are there every day, all day. The woman comes in different clothing, but all are torn up sweat pants and sweat shirts. I understand it is a public space, but should we really allow homeless people to squat it out in our facilities? I'm really just bothered because the food smacking noise will forever be ingrained in my brain and it makes me shutter. Anyone know who I'm talking about?

Why is it that everyone in my merchandising 2350 class has the IQ of somewhere around 85?
Okay, this is a major based on fashion; it doesn't require a lot of brain power. I can see why all the idiot girls would flock to it, but I didn't know they let people this dumb into college. This past Monday, a girl known to me as "Muffin Top," went on a five minute tangent on why she loves St. Patrick's Day.

It went a little like this: "I just...I just love St. Patrick's Day. I don't really know why; I just do. It's St. Patrick's Day--what could be better? I mean, it's like the greatest holiday in America. Well, really, the entire world. Like, I get to wear green. It is great."

As Muffin Top babbled through her idiocy, I banged my head against my desk. When our professor asks questions, no one ever answers and when she finally starts calling on people, each one repeats the same answer, one after another. I really think a lot of girls just thought, "Oh hey, daddy buys me Seven Jeans and I know how to coordinate shirts and throw it all together with my knock-off Chanel bag, so I should totally open my own boutique one day!" These girls are mostly freshmen, so maybe I'm being a little harsh, but I'm fairly certain in a few years ECU is going to spit out a lot of overly-dressed, clueless girls.

Is "Love in the Club" really that great of an idea?
Granted, I pathetically love all things Usher and when Burch told me he had a new song out, I frantically ran to my computer to download it. But the song is illogical, which most rap is, but Usher's songs usually are a little bit above the "rims and hos" standard of today's rap.

The entire premise is that Usher sees some hot girl and wants to fuck her in the club or "On the couch, on the table, on the bar, or on the floor," if you will. Now maybe I haven't been to enough clubs, but I'm fairly certain you're not allowed to get up on the bar and stuff some girl's turkey, even if you are Usher. And what does bag you like some groceries that you got from aisle three really mean?

Lastly, if you're going to fuck in a club, shouldn't you try to be pretty covert about it? Usher is suggesting getting naked and porking her all over the place. I've shamefully worked out to this song every day for the past month, but every time it comes on when I'm running, I ask myself "why can't they just go home?"

Veneral Disease AY!

2008-02-14T14:49:00.001-05:00

Happy Valentine’s Day, bitches!

This one is for all you girls out there:

Valentine’s Day: the day we are told to celebrate our love for each other by buying seasonally overpriced commercialized crap. It’s the day that singles are supposed to feel lonely and those in relationships get to parade their love around for all to see. But it’s also the day that also happens to be Thursday. It’s Thursday, so I’ll be going to yoga, eating dinner with all of the girls, watching Lost and getting appropriately drunk, since I don’t have Friday classes.

You see girls; it’s just a day. However, the murmurs that could be heard echoing through my classes, hallways and the Brick Yard that was littered with Valentine’s balloons, could tell you differently. I either heard your sob stories of being alone for another Valentine’s Day or how you were so excited about all this cutesy stuff you boyfriend was doing (which a football player informed me in class today is only done so they get laid and won’t get yelled at).

Apparently, today is a big deal. Did I miss it? The singles didn’t care yesterday that they were single. It’s not like some guy was going to jump out from the bushes and ask you to be his girlfriend, so was it really that big of a surprise that you wouldn’t be spending this day showered in perishable gifts? I also don’t remember requiring a guy to be happy with my life, but I guess that’s you. And to those in relationships—do you really need a specific day to celebrate the fact that you love each other? I don’t know, I find the whole thing really foolish. If only we all could decorate shoe boxes again and pass around Valentine’s cards covered in our favorite Disney Princess to everyone in our class—even to the snot nosed brat. Now that’s a day I would celebrate.

I don’t remember how much I cared about it last year, when I was taken. I know I spent a great deal of time planning our meal and a great deal of money buying it, but I don’t know how much I cared about the day itself. However, I didn’t mind the Godiva. Any excuse for chocolate is all right with me. In the past though, I’ve taken many last minute dates for the big day that led to nothing and ended as quickly as they began. And I felt no more loved than I did before the date. So why do we all feel so compelled to have someone to spend it with? If I were asked on a date this year, I would have turned them down. I couldn’t be happier to be single this time around and I can afford my own dinner.

So as you all scramble to find a date, buy your last minute presents that will be 75% off tomorrow, or sulk in your despair over lonely single life, I hope you realize it’s just a day; a day that I look forward to being able to continue my routine of yoga, Lost and my friends.

Mozal tov!

We're going to the chapel and we're gonna get divorced

2008-02-07T14:30:00.000-05:00

I bitch, therefore I am

The blog has returned. After several requests to revitalize the blog, I decided it was time to show the world my potential to be a bitch again. Upon re-reading old posts, I would like to go ahead and apologize for the copious amounts of grammatical mistakes and the overarching lameness that many of the posts possessed. With that being said, I can assure you these will be much more articulated, extremely politically incorrect and quite clever.

This first rant idea came from Kaitlin Stock.

_____________________________________________________________________

As an official Facebook stalker, I keep tabs on all of your relationships (yeah, yours.) I watch your relationships become open ones that inevitably end in singledom. I see the pictures you post of you drunkenly making out with some guy that suddenly becomes your new boyfriend and even faster becomes your fiancé. Oh but wait, you’re single again…for a moment, with a lame facebook status to accompany it. And then as if nothing happened, you’re engaged again. I question any engagement that shows its faults through Facebook, but more importantly that happens when you’re only twenty years old.

It seems like in the past year there has been a mad dash to getting engaged. Engaged! I don’t even want to start thinking about marriage until I’m thirty. I’m sorry, but what do you know about yourself at twenty and twenty-one, absolutely nothing my friends. I hardly know what I want for dinner or where I want to go tonight and those will be the hardest decisions I have to make today.

Premature Engagers!
It’s always the people who have been dating for about eight months that get engaged early, because they are “so in love”. You haven’t even had time to figure out all the things that bother you about the other person and considering you will probably get divorced after a year or so, I’m sure there are probably a lot.

Virgins!
The people who pledge the abstinence card tend to get married early. They’ll tell you they are getting married for other reasons, but you know it’s really because they are horny bastards and just want to have sex. Sex is not worth getting married for, EVER. Plus, you’re wedding night is really going to let you down. It’s going to be a painful two-minute pump and chump. I’m just saying, it’s cute you have morals and values, but one day you’re going to realize that it was pretty stupid to wait—especially when you realize your relationship is wrought with problems since you’re only together because you wanted to get laid.

Those affiliated with the military!
Why? Why is it always someone who is dating a guy in the Marines, Army, Navy, etc. that is getting married at nineteen or twenty? I’m sure it all goes to the fact that the husband to be is going to Iraq soon and wants someone to write home to and someone who loves them. But man, if I was going to Iraq and was a guy, I would be doing mad bitches until the day I left, then would go pork a lot of hot Iraqi women (despite the fact that Muslims don’t practice pre-martial sex). However, I can see where the guy is coming from, the girl though? Why would they go along with that? Oh hey, lets get married right before I get deployed, then you can sit around for a year or so while I’m gone and you can’t see anyone else. Great idea. Sign me up right now!

If I still had my Courtship and Marriage textbook, I could bust out some solid statistics on early marriages, but alas I don’t. I do remember though that the bottom line of all of them was that the divorce rate for young marriages is between 70-80 percent. Awesome, you can be a divorcee by 23! Hot.

The biggest problem I have with young marriages is the fact that you’re most likely poor.

When I get married, I expect a giant rock! I don’t want some discount ring from Ross Simmons. It doesn’t necessarily have to be covered in diamonds, it just needs to be fabulous and at twenty you can hardly afford the dollar menu at McDonalds. And as much fun as going into debt over a mediocre wedding would be, I don’t think it would be. Oh cute, mommy and daddy helped you pay for the ring and the wedding? Classy. I want to pay for my own wedding (I'm sure most people are going to disagree with that part) and my husband pay for my ring, so I can get what I want and not have to use plastic flowers and cheap food because we couldn’t afford better. (One of the weddings that I catered at St. Michael’s had plastic flower arrangements and uncovered plastic chairs at the tables; it was awful.) Maybe I’m just materialistic, but that doesn’t sound like a dream wedding to me; it sounds like a cop out.

My last irk goes to all those promise rings out there. First and foremost, those Irish Promise Rings (which I don’t see given a lot anymore, thank God) are ugly as shit. If I were given that as a promise ring, I would promise to never wear it. The promise rings I see more often look more like engagement rings and what I get from it is that the guy is promising to marry the girl, but isn’t proposing yet. Which translates for me as, “I don’t want you to do other guys and have to worry about you, so you’re on lockdown mode with this, without me really have to make a commitment.” By all means give me jewelry, but I don’t want promises.

Go ahead get married before you can even legally drink at your own wedding, go ahead and have boring missionary sex every night, go ahead realize you made a giant mistake and go ahead and get divorced before you can legally rent a car because it’s love and nothing can come between it; the rest of us would never understand. I rather be single and drowning in my own bills and problems than that and someone else’s. Maybe I’m jaded and bitter, but I do not envy your life for a minute.

(the only young marriage I could possibly condone is Amanda and Josh's because those freaks really are meant for each other)

Lets make a trip to the inconvenience store

2006-10-10T16:57:00.000-04:00

So first, as usual I need to preface this blog entry with something; this blog entry is not directed at anyone in particular, this is just an observation and pet peeve I have dealt with for many years and its time to let everyone know.

I'm not sure if its because I grew up in Cary, or people are just self-centered, or oblivious, or it just merely the American way, but it becomes more and more apparent that people are overall inconsiderate every day.

One situation I have dealt with since I have been able to drive, is driving others. I don't mind driving other people around, I do mind when other people make me wait. If i am going to pick you up, be ready. I hate sitting outside of your house, so that you can decide what to wear. I gave you a specific time to be ready and I usually run 5 minutes late, so that gives you a buffer, don't inconvenience me, especially if I have to be somewhere and I am doing you a favor. That's being self centered and failing to see that someone is going out of their way for you and then you are making them wait, and making them late. If it is a situation you can't handle, like Kristen had a doctors appointment and was late coming back and called to tell me, thats one thing and I understand. Its another, when you don't call and then dont even call when I am there beeping my horn and waiting. It is not until I call you and you pick up saying, "oh it will just be a minute" and then that minute turns into 10.

Inconvenience example two: There is a girl in my French class, didnt have the book and we had a test in 2 days, so she asks if she can borrow mine for an hour, make copies in the library and will return it to me when I'm on a break at lunch. So i lend it to her and call her around 12:30 when she said she would be done with it. "Oh, I decided to get something to eat, Ill have it around 12:50." She knows I'm at the library, comes in there at 12:50 and says "oh I just finished eating, I'm going to copy it now. Ill give it to you in like 30 minutes." I had class at 1, so i told her to meet me at 1:50 outside the library no later, because I have another class across campus in 10 minutes. I get out of class go down there and she isnt there. I call her, she doesnt pick up. It is not until several minutes later that she shows up and I have to haul ass across campus. Because of her inability to realize that this was severly inconveniencing me and I was doing her a favor, is ridiculous. Oh and she also sits next to me and copies off of some of my quizzes. great.

When someone borrows something. Kind of refers to the story above. How many times have you lent someone clothes, shoes, a book, or anything, and don't get it back until you go and get it. And then sometimes when you get it back, it is damaged somehow. This is why I no longer lend clothes out. I have been screwed over so many times. I either never get it back, or they are stained, stretched out or I have to go and get it and atleast a month has passed.

When someone says they will do something and dont. Like if youre in a group project and if you assign a certain section to one of the kids in the group and when the group meets the next time, ohhh they were sooo busy they couldnt do it. Just admit to why you didnt do it. You got too drunk and were too hungover and lazy to do it. I won't respect you anymore for saying that, but dont make up some stupid lie about having to do something else, when really you were being a selflish bastard and inconveniencing everyone else!

I also hate when everyone expects everything to be their way everytime and because I'm better at being a bitch towards you behind your back, instead of to your face like you deserve, I just let you get it, everytime.

I may be a giant bitch, but I am always waiting outside when someone is going to pick me up, if I say im going to do something by a certain time, I do and there are only like two things in the past I forgot to return. So fuck all of you inconveniencing whores. Its your fault this world is fucked over.. well ok, maybe not. but you certainly ad a lot of anger to it.

Adult Students get Psychodelic.

2006-09-13T23:29:00.000-04:00

I would like to address an issue that has been getting increasingly worse with every class that these people are present in.

Adult Students: and why I hate you.

Hi, you decided to come back to school and get an education. Good for you.
You decided you were gonna come back and focus and make good grades. Good for you.
You decided to ask ridiculous questions, non stop and slow the class down. Fuck you.

It started with last year, I had two of them in my english class. One was a mental retard at times. She was unaware of what a 5 paragraph essay was and MLA. She also contributed a lot of other stupid questions to our class time. We had another he was actually intelligent, but he liked to team his stone washed jeans and stone washed jean jacket together for every class period. But he actually added thought provoking questions to the class.

But this year has brought me much worse along the lines of adult students.
Once again I only have 2, but in a class of 100, you'd think they were the only students.

Welcome to Intro to Psych. A freshmen course that follows the exact curriculm that we learned in AP psych at Athens. Basically to make an A in this class, one must take the quizzes online, read chapters and study for the tests. Comprehending the information involves reading and attending class. Questions, for the most part, are never needed to be asked.
But... the adult students see this differently.

Let me describe both of them.

One is a man probably in his mid 50's but could easily be anywhere from his 40s to his 60s, its hard to tell. Wears jorts and sits in the upmost closest seat to the front on the left. Gets to class early, spreads all his class supplies across his tiny desk, and is ready to learn.
Everytime something stands out to him, which could be a single word like the word "most" (which happened) he will raise his hand, say that that word stood out to him, proceed to tell some sort of old man tale and end with a question, easily 5 times a class period. The man is so annoying. Its as if he feels like he needs to bestow his knowledge upon us, when really we jsut want to get through our lesson and dont give a shit about him and his opinions. I hate you old man.

The other is an old black woman with huge hair. She could be anywhere from her 50s to her 70s, it is also hard to gauge her age. She also sits in the upmost closest seat to the front, but on the right. She looks like a crazy, old bag woman. She is not as persistent as the old man to be as annoying, but she does however, bring up stupid questions about the chapter or an experience she had that MIGHT relate to what were talking about. One of tuesday's questions was..."why do I have more trouble with playing the piano with my left hand, than my right hand?" My teacher simply asked her if she was right handed, which low and behold she was, but that was not sufficient enough for her, she continued on with some mindless drabble, while I slit my wrists on the desk.

Because of these adult students, who think that they need to ask question after question, to make an A and fully understand, really put our class behind and make it drag. I think ill understand less with them in the class because they will detract from the information and get me thinking about the time the old woman got corrective eye surgery *even though she totally still wears glasses?*

So, I believe we should start a campaign in efforts to abolish all Adult students who try too hard in class and prohibit them from speaking during classes.

Thank you. Vote for me?

Mange-le

2006-08-27T20:25:00.000-04:00

I have now written several posts for the return of school, the return of the idiots, the return of chubby students and soon to be chubby freshmen, and the return of the non-stop complaints, but alas, none of them have been good enough. And why this one will be good enough? Well, it won't but I figured I needed to start this year off somewhere and you'll take what you can get.

So first off, let me say life off campus is blissful. No more boys bouncing their basketballs or balls on the floor at 2 am, no more dead roaches in the shower, no more running down the hill in attempts to make it to class on time and NO MORE DINING HALL. Never again will I return to on campus living.

So as I have not had enough time to really form a large complaint or witness anything horrendous, I will simply complain about a few small things.

First off-French Class.
To begin, taking a foreign language class is never going to be fun and because my lovely major requires 4 semesters worth of it, I've got a long way to go. Last year, my teacher had major surgery and was out for 6 weeks and we got this sweet substitute, which allowed me to just sit back and nod along. This year, I have a professor who goes on french tangents, that I'm sure will lose me quite often. But, whats really going to make this french class an interesting experience is the girl who sits in front of me. Let me first explain that I thought she was a man and it wasn't until my professor read the roll that I realized she wasn't. Anyway, this is not what bothers me. What bothers me about this girl is that she brings her laptop to class everyday. It would be one thing if she just used it before class started or merely took notes on it, but does she? No...no she doesnt. She sits there typing furiously away on AIM. Chatting at 10 a.m. in french class, in front of me. Then to add to it, occasionally she surfs around on the internet. Great. So its 10 a.m., I'm trying to stay awake and figure out what this french tangent is on and she's typing loudly. Its so distracting! It doesn't even appear to phase my french professor, he never looks at her disdainfully *which i totally would, if I wasn't staring at the back of her head*, he never says put that away, he just goes right on with the french lesson. I hate you laptop bitch.

Another issue came about in French: I get to class early because the U manor bus picks up at 9:26, so I get to class 20 minutes early and just sit there eavesdropping on everyones unimportant conversations. The one on Friday morning sparked my interest, not because I care about this topic, but because I hate it so much. Two kids were talking about how we should be able to play World Of Warcraft in class and how they could talk to the people on the server in french. I, realizing that the game will be following me wherever I go, start to hate it even more, until I had a realization. Last year in Bo's wonderous Music Appreciation class, there was some tard who brought their laptop to class everyday and played World Of Warcraft, while sitting in the front row. I always thought they were a man...
But now...I see, it could very well be the girl who sits in front of me, in the front row, with her lap top everyday, that was the one playing WOW in Bo's class. Fuck me.

My last strange happening on friday occured before my Media Writing class. My french teacher let us out 20 minutes early because he had to get to the airport, so once again, I was just dicking around before class. So I went to the Media Writing room and sat down on the ground outside of the room, across from some boy. Now, granted I had only had this class one other time, so I don't know whose in my class yet and whose not, I just assumed he was. He was this strange boy, sitting there in this chair, dressed in all black and a tobaggon (its august?), totally succumbed by some book he was reading and slightly twitching. At the time, I was unaware that the door was locked and just noticed that the room was dark, so I asked him if he thought we could go in. He then proceeds to look up very slowly, looks me straight in the eye and says "No", in the creepiest way and then goes directly back to reading. So I get out my cell phone to text Jenn and I can see with every button I hit, he twitches a little more out of annoyance, as if my typing was really loud and obnoxious and interrupting his reading of the text book. In the end, he wasn't in my class, he went into the film class next to my room.

There seems to be an overly abundant amount of weirdos at ECU now. Instead of a lot of stupid, skanky girls, ugly weird people took over. What's happening? I liked the dumb bitches better, atleast I could laugh at them without feeling bad.

I dont know, its late, im tired, this is what you get

2006-07-07T00:26:00.000-04:00

Something has come to my attention and as the meaning of it has confused me, I thought I'd address it here and so if anyone has any other ideas of what this really means, feel free to write a comment.

Recently, I have seen the following quote pop up on peoples profiles, "Drink Triple, See Double, Act Single."
Firt off...if you are single, acting shouldnt be involved. You are single, therefore you do not need to act single. If youre not single...what does acting single entail?

My question is this...Does saying act single mean, sleep with all the boys you possibly can while being severly intoxicated, considering you are drinking triple and seeing double....your vision and understanding of numbers will be blurred. But then allow you to use the fact that you're "single" as your excuse for your loose vag?

Because if I were to "act single", there would just be a lot more big m time, tv time, and asking people if they had any cute friends and inevitably getting annoyed. I don't think thats what this slogan is promoting.

When I first read this little singleton enpowering quote I thought it was cute, but I just dont get what it means. Does anyone know the answer?
Am I acting single now? how bout now? Are you? Were you? Who gave you this information!?

And on a completely other note, I have come to the realization that some people are only friends with me when its convenient to them. So I decided, I will no longer contribute to our friendship, why waste my time on someone who doesnt really care about me except for when they need me? So sorry, come again.

Bum Crumb

2006-06-28T12:29:00.000-04:00

A few things that have been troubling or have always troubled me:

Is anyone else completely incompetent when it comes to folding a newspaper back to its original state. I attempt to fold it, then get flustered and leave it in a giant piled up mess on the table. That is why, I have given up all efforts to read the newspaper. If I need to be informed, I get my information from collegehumor.com, because its always accurate and folds up neatly on your computer screen.

I am also finding that I am unable to obtain credit cards from stores. I attempted to apply for the Victoria Secret card, all so I could get free underwear, but alas, as usual I was not approved. You can't get a credit card with out credit, but how do you get credit then if you can't get the card? I will now try applying for a shell credit card, hopefully it will work out. Who knows!

Also, it appears that NC hwy 55 has become the hub for homeless beggers. But they also seem to be wearing those reflector vests. Do you think the state stepped in and said, "Look sir, you can badger all the people you want for money, but you will be doing it in a reflector vest. We don't want any lawsuits on our hands, where you'll get money just because you got hit." I hate that sad look they give you and if they have half a limb, they really try to play it up by limping really badly. I don't carry cash on me, and very little change, there is nothing I could give them. If I had food, maybe I'd give it up. But I'm not going to give to some man on the street, when I don't know if my money really will go to his starving family or his starving appetite for alcohol. So when I do decide to hand out money, it will be to charity. Because those people really can get a job, (unless they have psychological disorders, which I understand is about 50 percent of homeless people), because I have a friend who lives out of his car by choice and has a job, dresses fine and is sanitary, he finds ways to make it work and he has plenty of money now.

I don't understand those erector set like spoilers on the backs of shitty cars. It looks so dumb. Its obvious its been added to the car. Its never on nicer looking cars though, its on beat up hondas from the 80s? I want to know what the appeal is.

Finally, I am pissed with Beyond Fitness. I have been mad now for about a week and a half. They closed the Wavery Place one because they got evicted since they dont pay their rent. And everyday that I go to the NW maynard one, they tell me ohh they'll be opening in (insert three days ahead of what day it is). Finally they said that they will be opening tomorrow or today. Tomorrow being the latest that it will be. But I'm willing to bet, that when I go to the maynard one, that they will tell me its not opening now till Saturday. Fuck you Beyond Fitness.

That is all for now, gotta get back to play literati at work.

2006-06-23T10:18:00.000-04:00

I am important and useful

2006-06-21T15:24:00.000-04:00

Today at work was spent getting sucked deep into hours of college humor articles written by Aaron Karo, while occasionaly answering the phone and passing time on Drew's online test for him. I hold much importance at this job. But as bathroom trips and trips to the front desk are frequent, I get to see a lot of people...

Does anyone else enjoy walking into the bathroom at work and noticing that some lady has obviously been taking a shit, but upon hearing the bathroom door open, she quickly wraps up her dropping session, waits till you get in a stall, then hurrys to wash her hands and rushes out the bathroom, all so I won't know it was she that was taking that odious dump. I chuckle to myself and go about taking my daily work shit and pray that someone like me doesn't come and interrupt that moment. I feel bad for that woman who prematurely had to leave and might be waddling into her office now. But really, not all that bad.

Does anyone else enjoy that awkward moment in the hallway at the office, where someone passes you and you don't know if you should say Hi, or smile? Those are the moments when doing all this important work is really worth it. I like to aid to it but looking at these people a little too long and they too are unsure of what to do.

There is also a lady who works here that looks like Ms., oh lord I can't remember her name. It started with a B, she taught math at Athens. I had her to algebra 1. She was kind of a bitch, everyone thought she was a lesbian, had really short hair, she ended up getting cancer and leaving. Anyone know who I'm talking about. Anyway, this lady looks just like her, but is even stranger. She sits in the kitchen area, eating her lunch and watching the tv screen that sometimes just says, this channel is out of commission or some shit like that, all the while looking like a preying mantis.

---- some non work related issues that really irk my balls

Safety google sized sunglasses. Ok any over sized sun glasses. This trend has been going strong now for TWO years! When is it going to phase out already? I admit, I took part of it by wearing the medium oversized sunglasses, but they both broke and I moved on. The real reason us girls wear these sunglasses is A. because they make our hair look better. b. because we hungover and look disgusting or are just plain ugly to begin with, or too damn lazy to put make up on. C. because people think its cool because Nicole Richie does it. Well I'm here to tell you, that whether you spent 200 dollars on your dolce and gabbana ones or 1o bucks at target, you look like a bug and you're not fooling me. I know an unattractive face is shinning brightly underneath your spaceship sized glasses. Nicole Richie looks dumb in them and so do you. I would also like to add that Kathryn and I had to spend 30 minutes in Nordstrom to find an even remotely small pair of sunglasses and I some what succeeded. For ten bucks, I took what I could get.
(i know ross, you've been feeding me this shit for a year, you don't have to say it.)

Does anyone else cringe at the noise when they are scraping your teeth with that pick thing at the dentist. It really makes me want to die.

Just to remind everyone, there are only two weeks before the Journey concert, so go get your tickets.

And finally the last thing that really irks my balls, is that all the girls with small titties get cute bra options. I have been proclaiming the amazingness of the Semi Annual Sale for a month and a half and planned out my budget and exact time and location that I would be able to be there on the first day. But low and behold, once again us big titty girls get the shaft. I mean its still VS so they are still the world's greatest bras. But we don't get all the cute options that small titted girls get. So next time youre staring in the mirror at your small titties, wanting larger ones, jsut think when sale time comes around you wont be able to buy ones with the polka dots or hot bows. Damnit Victoria Secret, why must I love you soo much?

Fatty bo Batty

2006-06-20T13:39:00.000-04:00

Upon my recent trip to Disney World, it became all too apparent that America really is one big giant Fat Ass. The fat people outnumbered and outweighed the skinny ones. And Disney didn't help to contribute to the fat farm by only providing foods like hotdogs, cheese burgers and pizza. There were salads and such, but you had to stand in long lines to get the healthy food.

I understand some people are born with genetics and builds that automatically make them overweight, but you could tell most of these people did not fall into that catergory. This isn't a post saying I hate fat people, but it is saying what the hell happened to everyone?

In elementary school, there was usually only one or two fat kids and they got ruthlessly made fun of by the trailer trash and snobby kids. And those kids either went on to lose weight or continue to be chubby. But if you drive past a playground now, over 50 percent of those kids are FAT ASSES and they probably pick on the few skinny kids because they dont have their own tire to play with.

With the rise of more and more healthy food options being available, I would think people would be losing weight a lot more easily, but no people are just getting fatter and fatter. Then you have the people who are like, "I'm too busy to work out" or "I'm just not able to lose weight", of course you can't when youre stuffing your face with McDonalds french fries and I'm sure most people do have the time, theyre just too lazy.

Ok.. so being over weight is one thing, but if you can dress yourself well, then its not really that big of a problem. But its the fatty girls that think by wearing smaller clothes they'll look skinner, that give fat people a bad name. ATTENTION ALL GIRLS WITH FAT ROLLS, wearing a shirt thats 2 times too small and your rolls are visible or hanging out IS NOT ATTRACTIVE and it only makes you look fatter. And lastly, just because your skinny friends are wearing bikinis, does not make it ok for you to wear a bikini. and if youre past the age of like 40, please dont wear a bikini, even if youre in shape, you still look gross. Accept that youre older please. Also to those big boobied women, please cover them up accordingly, no one wants to see your sag.

Just getting a quickie in

2006-06-09T18:03:00.000-04:00

I hate you, yes you, the jackass that comes speeding up on the off ramp during traffic and cuts all of, by squeezing in the line, half a mile in front of where you should have been
.
Who are you Mr. Im more important and busy than you that you think you're special enough to get in front of all us. I know your tricks. I'm not letting you in. To quote a great scene from Sex and the city, "You're just soooo BUSY.. SO busy!!!!!!" *when Carrie is pissed right after Berger breaks up with her* You know, we're all trying to go somewhere and maybe even where we are going is more important than where you're going. No, can't be actually, because we're all patient enough to wait in the line like were supposed to, instead of being a shit head and speeding in front of all us, fooling people into thinking you're getting off the highway, but NO no you're not... youre just gonna squeeeeeeze in with us. Jackass. I don't like people like you and I don't let people like you in.
And you shit smear girl, speeding along the side of Kildaire, right before it becomes one lane, near the entrance of Matties neighborhood. It gets really backed up around 5 and you just think cus youre some girl that you can speed along there and wave all cutesy to some boy and hell let you in. Well of course he did... gah.

Fuck all of you people cutting ahead of the line. Didn't we learn the importance of line making in kindergarten, aside from the finger in the air motion, we learned how to be quiet, wait our turn and stay in line. The next person that does that anywhere near me, im gonna put half my car in that line and flick them off and pray to god they dont have a shot gun in their car.
and if I'm in the car with someone who does that, they are getting a firm kicking to nuts or cunt punt.

I don't really like you.

2006-06-07T10:26:00.000-04:00

A few things that bother me:

I hate radio talk shows more than anything. I have a half an hour drive to work every morning, I want to hear music, not overweight unattactive 40 something year olds talking about their adventures in life, which aren't even interesting. The only stations that play music in the morning are 100.7 (which is perfectly fine, except they play a lot of commercials), 101.5, 93.9, and 98.7. But even then they are playing commercials and often bad music. I swear if any of my friends go into radio business and talk on the radio in the morning for like 4 hours a day, I will come back, find them at the studio and slit their throat right there in front of their ugly co workers, who only have a good voice and thats why they got the job. Play some fucking music already.

As I was watching TV this weekend I noticed a commercial about an auto mechanic school called Universal Technical Institute. But instead of calling it by its full name, they kept refering to it, along with having its webaddress like this... U.T.I. This school is obviously not geared towards girls in the slightest. Because I would not join a school that went by the name U.T.I., that can only bring bad news. Their advertisement and corporate people all must be guys, because no woman would let a school go by that. Can guys even get U.T.I.'s?

I'm really sick of my chocoholism. When we went to ECU there was a plethora of desserts everyday and night, so I certainly ate my share full, now that I'm home and don't have dessets readily at my disposal, I go out of my way t get big FATTENING chocolate cakes and desserts. I must stop, or I'm gonna be like that fat girl in the TLC video for Unpretty, where she hoards the cake slices in tuperwear under her bed.

I also am very annoyed by the large fucking Greek Letters in profiles. There is no need to make them so large or to even advertise it in there. Don't be proud that you're paying for your friends and popping your collars. Take off your North Face Backpacks, your sunglasses on strings and your tight sear sucker shorts from ralph lauren. Or do you just want me to make fun of you to your face?

and most importantly, Caitlin Burch and I are sick of all the fucking degenerates. We're sick of them!

Gym Maniacs

2006-06-01T16:15:00.000-04:00

As I have recently been going to the beyond fitness on a regular basis now (thank god), I've been noticing things that go on there. I occasionally see people that we knew from highschool and try to look really sucked into my working out, so A. they won't notice and B. if they do notice, they'll think I'm too busy to talk. Because face it, we weren't really friends in highschool, why do I want to talk to you and pretend I care how the last year of your life went? I don't. Anyway... but what I see more often than kids from highschool are overly buff dudes, grunting and sweating up a storm.

First off...being so buff that you could lay your arm on me and it would pretty much knock me over, is gross. Having every muscle toned in your body is really disgusting. Not only is your skin wrapped so tightly around your bones and muscle, but your head looks disproportional to the rest of you. But anyway.. you konw if you choose to look like an ape.. thats all you, but don't come the gym grunting like one. No ones impressed that you can lift like 500 pounds with one arm, i would hope you could with muscles like that. Its seriously pathetic, I know I write a lot of posts about people trying to hard, but I had to do this one. These guys, and few girls (which is even grosser than guys being that buff) will get on these machines and theyll lift a lot of weight, but grunt while doing it, not in like a REAL straining away, more in a way to have people look at them, because then they proceed to slam their weights down as hard as they possibly can (which may be why half of the machines are broken!), and then look around, like looking to see if anyone noticed. I'm not kidding, I've witnessed this on several occasions.

Seriously, you're going to the gym, thats great.. helping America not look like the Michelin Man's cousin, but don't come to impress people or try to pick up girls who arent interested in your disgustingness.

On another note, not only do I not understand your want to look like an ape, but why do you have to wear little American Gladiator outfits. Maybe you are training for one of thats stupid competitions, but there is no need for you to come to the gym in your onesie spandex bikershorts attached to a tank top that doesnt even cover your nips. It makes me want to vomit, which actually might help me lose weight.. so hey.

Finally a note to the boys on the weight machine near what I call the "sex machines" or you know the ones you sit down at and you open and close your legs and works out the muscles in your thighs. Well I'd appreciate it if you stopped trying to look up my shorts when I'm working out, THANKS. Bastard.

Highschool Girls Return

2006-05-30T15:04:00.000-04:00

Coming home for the summer has brought back a lot of feelings of being in highschool, whether it be singing with Jenn in her car to old cds we made, not going out on the weekdays because I'm tired from work, mattie having a theme party, or just everyone being home, but what really took me back to highschool was this past week when I went out to eat with Hannah, Jenna and Andrea. We went to a restuarant in Cary to get dessert and someone Jenna and I knew from highschool worked there. I noticed her first and waved and then she saw Jenna and we realized she was gonna be our server.
Now, I had only one class with this girl and it was senior year and without me she wouldnt have gotten the grade she did. We werent friends outside that class and we werent really inside it either, but because of a lack of better people to talk to or sit with, we sat with eachother and did work together. Anyway, she was one of those girls who thought she was better than most people. I distinctly remember her being very angry about who made the Homecoming list because not enough of her "girls" were on it, and "they were the cool ones." And by definition this girl was in the "popular" group.. if thats what I have to call it. But she was one of the extreme ones, not associating with people who werent "cool" and giving attitude to anyone and everyone. Sometimes I thought it was cool that she had the balls to be that bitchy, othertimes I thought it was unnecessary. Now, she was somewhat nice to me, but if I showed up to a party where she was, I would only get a "hey", if that. Well anyway.. you might know who I'm talking about, you might not. It doesn't really matter.
Anyway, so as soon as she realized we were with Jenna, she directed all her attention to her and her and Jenna were never really friends either, but she was all in Jennas business asking her about school and stuff. She didnt say one word to me, other than do you want seperate checks. Like she really made a point to ignore me, completely. I don't really care that she didnt associate herself with me, it only made me feel bad for her, because she was still stuck in that ridiculous highschool mentality. And the funny thing is she always thought she was so mature, but I think if youre going to not talk to someone because you think youre too cool for them, than youre quite possibly the most immature person.
I even complimented her to Jenna when we left, saying that she looked a lot better than she used to, and yet shes still the same bitchy, pretenious girl she always was.
I would think that even in the later highschool years, people would stop being so selective with people they talked to. But shes already out of highschool, not doing anything with her life ( I know it because she almost failed highschool) and if anythign she is going to Wake Tech (which isnt bad in any way) but she probably isnt doing well there either. So for someone whose life is going no where fast, she should probably stop being such a snooty girl and accept all the people she can. Because she CERTAINLY ISNT BETTER THAN ME, I MEAN COM'ON NOW!

drinky drinky

2006-05-29T19:29:00.000-04:00

So this isnt the post I said would be about people not growing up yet...that one is soon to come. This is one most of you probably won't like, but I really don't care.

So this post has two points, so Badders I'm not veering off topic.

First off:
I don't understand why people feel the need to take pictures of their fridges filled with beer. Yet, it happens quite often. It's like as soon as there are more than three cases of beer and two liquor bottles in the fridge, the camera has to come out and it has to be documented. But why?
I don't understand why its so amazing. Cool, people are hanging out, people are drinking, people bought/brought their own beer/liquor, so theres a lot in the fridge. The fridge will be empty by the end of the night, someone will go on another beer run. More beer/liquor will be digested. Sounds like a typical night of people drinking to me. Are you impressed or something that your fridge has soo much beer in it? Cool. Neato. Kids are getting drunk, Whats new? It may be one thing if only like 4 people were drinking from a completely stocked fridge and were going to finish it in one night *no you couldnt do it, so stop thinking you totally could. If you could, get yourself help now cause youre on the fast track to being a overweight raging alcoholic* So why take pictures of your fridge? You can see them on anyone's online photo album...We get it, you drink, your friends drink, you get drunk, they get drunk.. And on that particular night, a lot of you got drunk. Cool. Sweet picture, man. Keep up the good work.

Secondly...I don't understand the people who get really pumped about drinking or mad if they can't drink. This isnt anything new. I'd say atleast for my friends, we been drinking strong now since junior year *yea whatever, you drank before that.. you want a cookie or something* so... we've been drinking quite frequently for two solid years now and in the summer its 5 times more intense than it is in the school year. We all know what its like to get drunk, to do something you regret while being drunk, to hook up while drunk, to throw up from being drunk, to be hung over, tod o all the typical things a drunk does. But is that all anyones social life is now.. Uho... its past 9 o clock, why arent we drunk yet? What do you mean people don't feel like goign out tonight!? Who doesnt want to get drunk!? It got old. It got real old. Of course there are necessary nights where you need to drink like holidays, birthdays, good concerts *aka journey*, really awesome parties (like liannes week last summer or any of matties) but... I don't get how we can all jsut go out and get drunk all the time. Whats so fun about it? The only real reason I drank after the really new funness of it wore off was so I could hook up with someone.. well now that thats taken care of, I don't need to drink tha tmuch. I understand people like to drink. But to get angry when people dont want to, or to get so overly excited about it.. is kind of ridiculous. So one night passes.. you can surely drink the next night. Sure drinking games are fun, but still. I don't know. Don't take this as a OHH well don't invite robin, shes gonna bitch about us drinking. I don't care. I just dont get it.

And the let's go get high every night and day of our lives.. got real old.

nut licker

2006-05-19T00:04:00.000-04:00

HOW DARE THEY KILL MARISSA. HOW DARE THEY!

My thoughts are... since they didnt confirm her death, that shes just really hurt and shell be messed up and thats why people are crying next season.. Or its totally unrelated. Either way, Marissa will come back. Whether alive or as an even more ghostly figure.. I dont care...shell be there. And I'll be there to watch her try to get through her lines.

Since people are complaining about the lacking of good posts.. ill post a good one tomorrow.. SO SHUT UP BITCHES. LEAVE THE COMPLAINING TO ME. Lick my nuts.

a lame post not worth your time

2006-05-17T22:05:00.000-04:00

Because I watch entirely too much tv, I felt my pointless thoughts on finales was necessary.

First off: Thank God Jade got kicked off of America's Next Top Model. I wanted Joanie to win but I guess Gap Tooth is ok, as long as it isn't Jade.

Elliot shouldn't have gone home for American Idol... Clearly Kat blows. Taylor will definitely win.

I'm lame and watch 7th Heaven and I was thoroughly disappointed with that series finale. Long live the Camdens.

Grey's Anatomy.. uh YES! It was excellent. How dare they kill Denny and keep dragging out this Meredith and McDreamy stuff!

I really liked the new show What about Brian and the South Park Season has been beautiful and DEGRASSI is 100 percent intense and totally goes there.. Emma with anorexia WHO KNEW!

Finally...The OC finale is on tomorrow.. and I'M PUMPED. Who's gonna die?!
and The House finale will be sweet as well..
I really shouldn't watch this much tv.

And as for the Jimmy V post Anthony made a very good point:
A Errato 11 (9:29:50 PM): shouldnt you say "people who quote jimmy v are idiots" instead of "jimmy v is an idiot"? because if you are going to call jimmy v an idiot, it probably shouldnt be for something he said while he was dying, but for all the illegal recruiting practices he did in the 80s while the coach at state

He is in fact right.. the post was about the idiots who quote him.. not really Jimmy V.

Jimmy V Give up!

2006-05-16T00:07:00.000-04:00

So I check everyones facebook profiles because I'm really lame, I'm probably reading yours right now. Anyway, I've noticed a really annoying quote under a lot of peoples favorite quote section. I just happens to be by Jimmy V and it just happens to be, Don't give up, don't ever give up.

Thank you, Jimmy for that really novel advice. I haven't heard anything so clever, so inspiring, so uplifting before in my life. Now, I will never give up. Never. I will eat the entire pint of icecream I set out to finish. I will play Mario Cart until I can kick everyone's ass. I will get that stain out of my shirt. All thanks to you Jimmy V. Thank you. Really.

Okie, so Jimmy V came up with this silly little quote. Inspiring, yeah whatever. People say a lot of dumb things everyday. Some of them shouldn't get written down and remembered. And this is just one of them. It's like a bad laminated poster in your middle school classroom, wheres some cute cat is hanging from the tree. But not only was this quote written down and remembered, people now have it as their favorite quote. A lot of people.

It would be one thing if these kids had a hard life. And I mean hard, not you still sucking your thumb til you were 12 and wetting the bed til you were 8. Sure, sure your dad may have been laid off his ritzy job and you could no longer afford Abercrombie and Fitch whenever you wanted, you might have had to get a job when you turned fifthteen, maybe you even got suspended or something from school. But I'm gonna go with if you live in Cary you probably had a pretty easy life, unless you had extremely deep rooted family problems, then ok.

But its not like the kids I see who have this on their profile grew up in the ghetto, had to raise their mothers 4 illegimate kids, try to get good grades so they could get in college, but kept having someone bring him down (I'm thinking that Derek dude from Save The Last Dance here). Then I'd understand the whole never give up shit. But these kids are going to good schools that their parents are paying for and the only thing they are told to not give up on is that next shot. "Come on Dude, one more. Don't give up now, you pussy."

I don't want to get some shit from people about how I don't know if your life is hard or not, because that's not the point. The POINT IS pick a more original quote for your quote section or your motto to live by. Because youre still alive aren't you...youre a good school YOU OBVIOUSLY HAVENT GIVEN UP YET. SO SHUT UP JIMMY V, YOURE NOT HELPING ANYONE. I'd give up, just to piss you off.

I couldn't help but wonder...

2006-05-10T04:19:00.000-04:00

I just returned from a night of hanging out with my brother and these nights are always interesting and fun. We eventually always get to conversations of why people do this or that, and how they're wrong or whatever and I contribute my girl's perspective and he, his guy's perspective. So it always makes for an intriguing conversation. (to clear something up, this complaint is in no reflection of my brother, he just got me thinking about it)

So I got to wondering, why do guys act one way with their guys and then another way with a group of mixed people? Why is a guy two seperate people depending on the situation?

Of course everyone adapts to the people around them, you'll stop cussing around people who don't like it, you'll be more polite around elderly people, and you'll do more ass kissing in a minute to your boss than Sigfred and Roy. But there is a distinctness with certain boys, that when they are with their "boys" they are one person and with others they are another. Fortunately, I do not hang out with boys like this because I mostly deem them as superficial assholes...but for the sake of complaining I will devulge further.

The boys that have "boys" and have to act differently around them can be summed up in one word: Insecure. (and as stated many, many times before but just incase you missed it, I hate insecure people). Why else would someone have to be two people, unless they are schitzo.
These are the boys that if I were to go out with, God forbid I ever did, would tell you nice things (most likely to get laid) and we can hope they are sincere but most likely not. Then when you mistakenly put out, (because these boys don't actually know what they are doing), they run and tell all their friends about how, "She couldn't keep your hands off of me and practically begged me to have sex with her. So I stuffed her more than your turkey on Thanksgiving."

Ok, so yes, any disrespecting asshole would exaggerate about sex, it doesn't mean he is a two toned person, but I'm gonna go with that if you have to exaggerate about sex you are insecure, and therefore (if we learned how to do proofs in geometry, which i didnt really) if you are insecure you have two personalities.

Its the boys that have "boys", who have to act all tough around their friends, have to talk about all the sex they have had, and how fucked up they got and definitely recount all the drinks they had, just to prove that they outdrink their "boys". And why would someone do this... because they are insecure. Why would you have to make yourself look better than someone else, especially your friends, because really you dont think you are, but you want them to think so, so you can feel better about your pathetic self.

Insecure boys attrack equallly losery insecure boys and none of them will admit that they are insecure, we only know by their lame attempts to impress people and when they get drunk and accidently let out their secrets to unsuspecting girls, and then those girls inform the girl world and we all laugh behind your back. We're great aren't we.

So what I'm saying is, insecure boys move in packs, much like buffalo and you dont want to be plowed by a buffalo. It answers the question of why boys join frats, why college/highschool drop outs ban together, why meterosexuals are very good friends with other metrosexuals, and why all these guys happen to be assholes.

Being an asshole does not mask your insecurities boys, it doesnt make me think your dick is larger and that youre better than someone else. It just makes me think youre just another insecure asshole, just what the world needs.

This topic quickly turned from two personality boys to insecure boys, with no conclusion to bring it all together, but I hope you see that what I'm saying is, if you run into a group of boys that are insecure they are likely to be two different people. And although you think they might be sweet and all those nice things they said to you night before were quite flattering, its probably fake and the shit will hit then fan when you realize that they support their boys more than they support you and that you'll always lose. So if you want a healthy relationship, avoid insecure boys, you can't help them become more secure with themselves, you'll only make yourself more insecure and then I might not like you.

That ones for you, Pegasus. You're better than them <3 (to clear this up, this is not my brother. Pegasus knows who they are.)
And because I'm thankful for not having an asshole boy like that, because I got my tubs. <3

I love you baby.

2006-05-06T00:12:00.001-04:00

Argh. This one will include a lot of people I know, which is good, the more people I can bother the better.

Now this one goes along with the last one about profiles. Of course its your own profile, its your space to write whatever the fuck you want, just like I can write whatever I want here, but I do question motives and meanings and reasons why some people write some of the stuff they do in their profile. So as everyday something new bothers me in profiles, I started thinking today about relationship involvement in profiles. And came to the conclusion that it just isnt necessary.

I used to think that when people had "I Love You's" to certain boyfriend and girlfriends in their profile or away message that it was just cute and sweet, but as I grew up and had an actual relationship (yes just one), I realized it just isn't necessary, and maybe almost juvenile.

You're in love (or think you are, what have you). That's great, I'm truly happy for you, love is a great thing. Im happy for the other person, you're happy for eachother. Everyone is happy. But why does it suddenly have to go public? Isn't your love for eachother enough, why does everyone else have to know about it?

Now, when I read people's profiles that say: I have the greatest girlfriend in the world
I LOVE YOU BABY, etc. etc.
I start to think that these words mean less and less and that they aren't sincere words.
These should be things between the two of you. Why must the world see it? If you've been with your bf/gf for quite some time, it would be assumed that you loved them, yes?
Wouldnt the other know it? I'm sure you say it to them. I sure they know how you feel, and how you feel. Or atleast I certainly hope so. I feel like sometimes its said to make others feel bad. Oh I have the greatest girlfriend in the world (because she just gave me the most amazing head and massage). (oh really cus my girlfriend does that a lot and me for her and we care about eachother and know that we're great that we don thave to publically tell everyone so that we ourselves can believe it.) * my attempts at pretending to be someone reading that away message*

My question is: If you have this great boyfriend/girlfriend and you love them, why does it have to be all over your profile about it? I find it quite cheesy. Your love for eachother should be strong enough on its own to not have to be plastered in your profile to justify your relationship to a world of people who don't care. If you're going to dedicate your profile to just one person, then you don't need to do it. Just dedicate your time and feelings for them, to them.

We're not 13 anymore. We don't need fuzzy stuffed animals or helium balloons that say I love you, to know that your bf/gf loves you and you certainly dont have to put it on the internet to let them know either. And if its your way of being proud youre in a relationship with this AWESOME person, then thats sad and pathetic. Be proud on your own, do let other people knowing about it make you feel better.

Well that's my Doctor Joy Brown post for the day. Yes it got cheesy, yes it called a lot of people out, but I do know that I will never ever have justify my relationship or any relationship by posting it in a profile.

Oh I've also seen a new development of photoalbums just completely dedicated to their girlfriend/boyfriend. Just sick. plain old sick. I really seriously, no doubt about it, almost threw up.

Put this in your profile if you licked Bowman's ass.

2006-05-01T18:13:00.000-04:00

You know what I'm sick of? Do you? It's those stupid, "If you like to be anally ass raped by a cow with mad cow disease put this in your profile" lines that people put in their profile.

Wow...you like to break out into spontaneous dance parties. I'm sorry you know someone who died from cancer. You're not dying from school. Who doesn't like bagels, even if you were making fun of people. Gurf, I can't think of anymore, but I'm sick of it. No more. Take them off, please. Please. I don't care that you have a crafty little message in your profile that means you're included in something and you want others who are the same to announce it too.

TAKE IT OFF, NOW.
RIGHT NOW (meredith style)

GAH. This one sucked, but im annoyed with your silly profile antics. I'm annoyed.

the top 10 things I learned from the dorms

2006-04-27T03:18:00.000-04:00

I am now counting down the hours left of dorm life... its about 12. So with the year ending and my dorm career coming so nicely to a close, I thought I'd write about things I learned while living in a dorm here at ECU and at UNCG.

1. Maintenance men show up when you least expect them to.
UNCG: Meredith and I at our computers on a tuesday afternoon moments before I have to go to class, a knock at the door, I assume its Laurin Martin...So I scream for the bitch to "Get the Fuck out you bitch." Turns out to be a frightened maintenance man.
ECU: Well.. I was taking care of some business.. ah hem... one afternoon and theres a knock at the door, figuring that they would just go away if I didn't answer.. I was wrong, they came in and I had to pretend to be asleep.

2. There really is lesbian activity in the showers.
UNCG: We had a lesbian who lived down the hall from us who liked to have LOUD sex in the showers at random times. I was always told to go in and listen and report back news to the boys and I happily obliged.
ECU: In Tyler, our showers are connected. Meaning that we have four, but there are pairs. But it goes without saying that if someone is in one of the pairs, you dont use the shower in the same stall. But not these girls, they shower together and have long serious talks with eachother while they shower.

3. People above you are always going to be really loud and really annoying.
UNCG: Now, we never knew if these people were 400 pounds, like to bowl at random times at night, were wrestling or just jumping around, but they were so loud really late at night. Luckily I had a loft bed so I would just retaliate and bang things as hard as i could against the ceiling, but it never really helped.
ECU: The boys above us play basketball at 2 am or have sex where the bed bangs against the wall. The basketballs gave me terrible headaches. But this time we actually complained and they got yelled at :).

4. It takes 3 days for a bowl of milk to curdle. I don't need examples here.

5. If you live on the first floor, there will be roaches.
UNCG: Roaches weren't too frequent but when they did come out, they came running from the air conditioner, meredith would jump up and scream and I'd grab a high heel and squish it.
ECU: This past weekend we had a roach infestation. It was nice, roaches were everywhere. The neighbors and I got to go on a killing spree in the bathroom and I got Ross to kill all the ones in my room after we raided the hell out of it. I'd say in total there were about 60 dead roaches around.

6. Construction workers pick the worst time to do work.
There's really no story except that at both schools I've been woken up numerous times in the morning and afternoon by noisy construction workers.

7) Mooning people is necessary to make friends.

8) People around you listen to THE WORST music.
UNCG: Hunter liked to listen to Dashboard Confessional really loudly with the door open, that always really made me and Mere really happy.
ECU: Well, I've had to hear really loud postal service which isn't awful... but then you always hear the annoying rap blaring somewhere.

9) People have no consideration for others in the lobbys.
UNCG: I studied for a few tests in there and everytime a big group of people would come in and watch tv or this big black kid would blast really awkward music on the computers in there, when clearly there were at least 5 other people trying to study as well.
ECU: The few times I've tried to study, a huge meeting started in there, some kid played the piano and sang really loudly, 6 girls came running in to watch America's Next Top Model. I gave up on the lobbys.

10) Hall Coordinator are always really annoying.
UNCG: God, that woman was a bitch. First off she lied to mere and me on our first tour back last summer. She never had anything nice to say and she closed the kitchen on us. She was also just strange and too old to be a hall coordinator.
ECU: For one, shes never around and two she has really really loud sex with her husband in her apartment, which is not connected to my room, but our neighbors room. They like to get in big fights and then have crazy loud sex. Unfortunately I havent gotten to hear most of this :(.

That wasn't much of a complaint and maybe not even that funny, but I'm still all jacked up on cafeine and really just want to go to sleep, but I don't see that happening soon. Summer starts oh so sooooon!

In a relationship with Slutty McDrunksville at UNC

2006-04-25T21:29:00.000-04:00

There are a plethora of things that bother me on facebook, but one thats always really irked me is when people have two people in their picture. Especially when that other person is their girlfriend or boyfriend.
It's bad enough when you have two people in your photo, I may know you and be able to decipher which one is you and which one is your overweight friend, but still why must you have other people in your photo? It is YOUR facebook, where YOUR FACE will be shown with YOUR interests. Not you and your drunk friends playing beer pong's interests.
But what really, really bothers me is the gf/bf in the picture. See theres this section on the facebook where you put whether you are single or not; the one that you got really excited about and immediately changed when your relationship status changed. So you don't need to put your significant other in your picture. I understand you're in a relationship and if i want to see them, all i have to do is click that persons name that it says you're in a relationship with. Once again this isnt a page for you and your gf/bf, it's YOUR page. It's not FACESbook (thanks tubs). I really hate it when they have them kissing too or doing something all Cutesy. I can't see your face if its kissing someone elses.
While on the subject of annoying bf/gf things on facebook, let me add one last thing-
I hate those stupid photo albums that you put up of you and your significant other that have obviously all be taken on the same day in the same room. Oh, how cute you can take 30 pictures of you and him/her doing silly shit together and kissing. Has it gotten to the point that you just dont have any other friends now because you spend all your time together, so you must fill your photo albums with only pictures of eachother?
I understand you're excited about your relationship, but understand that I'm trying to keep my lunch down when I'm innocently browsing through your photo albums. So maybe next time before you put up pictures of your boyfriend giving you a raspberry and you giggling in the backround, think about me and my stomach. Thanks.

You and your smug

2006-04-24T00:16:00.000-04:00

Since this past Saturday was Earth Day...this one is for you Earth! YA!
My parents came today to see my lovely apartment for next year (University Manor) and to move out a lot of my stuff, so as we were returning from lunch so we could pack up our car with all my crap, I noticed that someone had TP'ed the tree outside of my dorm. What was the point? I would think if you're going to TP something, you usually do it in someone's yard, after some sort of sports game or holiday where kids get dressed up and prostitute for candy, but why a dorm tree? Who are they effecting besides the poor tree and littering the campus? They are just making more work for someone to come and clean up.
I'm sure the custodial staff doesn't make a lot of money here and I know they must put up with a lot of kid's stupid shit. There are nights I've returned to my dorm to find a huge trashcan tipped over with massive amounts of trash just laying out in the street. There is food, cups and other random stuff dropped in the cafeteria and never picked up, and people then purposely turn their trays to block the tray line. Then the really immature people, namely boys, tear down stuff their RA's put up on the walls and destory other people's bulletin boards. And why!? Have we not grown up yet? Are we assuming that because we're all selfish assholes that we can litter whatever we want and expect someone else to clean up after it? And ruin someone else's work because you feel like it, because it would be funny?
People leave their shit everywhere and just think, oh someone else will take care of it. No, actually that would give them too much credit, they don't even think that... they just don't think and don't care. You're so fucking funny and so fucking cool for throwing your shit in the street. Wow...you really threw the styrofoam cup *that can't decompose* with one hell of a manly arm. But wait, there was a trashcan right next to you. But no...no trashcans aren't for you dickweed, the street is much more suitable for that empty cup. Or better yet, let's throw our cigarettes on the ground because that ash tray is just too many steps away.
Let's write on things, lets break random stuff that someone else paid for to convenience you, let's have huge water balloon fights and not pick up any of the 1000 balloons that are smashed between here and Brewster, let's spill ketchup all over the stairs and leave it there for people to smear up the rest of the stairs, lets break bottles in the street....lets just keep making more and more messes, so that the school has to hire more and more people to clean it up, so that inevitably they can just raise our tuition payments because they have more and more people to pay. Let's just keep fucking things up because we haven't grown up yet and its really funny.
God, you guys are annoying. I hope someone comes and fucks up your house and makes it a mess and you bitch and whine because for once you have to clean it up. I'm no tree hugger, but I atleast know how to not litter and how to pick up after myself. The next time I see someone litter I'll just pick it up and run after them telling them dropped it and if they give me attitude...ill just kick them in their tiny balls.
That one's for you Earthy!

I'm not here...well I am, but I'm not. Well it says I'm not. So I am.

2006-04-18T23:24:00.000-04:00

Michael Crook had an outburst complaint to me tonight and although I am 100% guilty of the following, he let it out and I'm gonna let the world know. So the following was written by Michael Crook, thanks Mikey.

I thought of something. It really pisses me off when people talk with their aways messages up. We've gotten so used to away message meaning that they're not there, so obviously they can't talk, but now, sometimes they are there. Now I don't know if they're really gone, or maybe they're just ignoring me. It makes me kind of paranoid. I can understand people wanting to show off their witty creation of an away message by leaving it up, but you know what-they're never creative. It's always something like "I'm Gone" when they're really not or some fucking emo quote that they're just trying to apply to their sad excuse for a life to get noticed in hopes that someone talk to them and feel sorry for them. But the kicker is, that when I do respond to their shitty emo quote, they're just going to ignore me.

I'm gonna slash your tires and your throat because I'm hardcore

2006-04-18T18:59:00.000-04:00

Hello Scene girls and boys, with your tight jeans, bandanas, straightened hair to the side, "I'm in a really bad band, but think I'm great" attitude, bad attempts at "hardcore dancing", stupid unnecessary facial piercings, suction tight thirft store t-shirts, and strange obsessions with your awful myspace and the terribly pathetic emo picture of yourself you have on it. Are you still suffering from those cuts you got last night from that show from that dude with the hair? Are you telling everyone how awesome it all was? Are you stoked because you went to this show of a band that YOU just discovered and they're "Fucking awesome...So intense, man."? When are you going to wake up to the stench of your own unwashed clothes that reak of smoke and B.O. and realize that no one is scene, nor are there "hardcore/metal" kids? So stop trying so hard.
This complaint isn't really directed at some people's measley attempts to look scene/hardcore...its more directed at how these people say, "music is my life" and then get all emotional about it, but i figured I had to introduce it with some scene kid bashing. (I wasn't even aware people were still trying to be scene/hardcore/emo etc... but I was wrong. Very wrong.)
These kids can pop up anywere and they find themselves so elite. And why they think they are elite... I don't know. They sit around talking about music and the sweet show they went to.
These kids or anyone that finds themselves smeared in their own shit of music obsession is annoying. People who love music-thats normal. People who can't stop talking about one certain band or how amazing this music is and how connected they are to it and how it moves them and gets all riled up if you say one little comment about said band because they have been listening to them longer than you and know more than you.
Its like these kids think they are better because you might have just started liking Backstreetboys, but they liked them back when they were playing concerts in school gyms. Ok, these kids don't like BBS, but they do like equally as bad as music...let's take a look why don't we?
I find these kids listening to music like -Fall out boy, Taking back sunday, Yellowcard, Coheed and Cambria....ETC.. what is the allure of high pitched girly voiced guys playing sappy music about how some girl ripped out his heart and ate it?
Ok fine. I realize that the kids who think they are scene or hardcore don't listen to that shit either, but they take so much pride in the fact that they like all these obscure bands and that they can sit around with all their "scene" friends and talk about the bands and how "scene" they all are. And the metal kids, they think they are so "hardcore" because they listen to music about killing people or lighting people on fire and wear stupid wrist bands, and punch people for no reason. They are all just as bad as that stupid PUNK revolution that happened a few years ago. Punk/Emo/Hardcore/Scene is not a way of life, its a kind of music. If you are unable to figure out who you are, associating yourself what you think is a way of life but isnt at all, is not going to help. So stop drowning in your terrible music obsessions, learn how to actually play the guitar and not those 4 stupid chords you know, pull your head out of your ass and take a look around because NO ONE CARES THAT YOU THINK YOU'RE SCENE, etc.

My other shirt has its collar popped

2006-04-17T14:50:00.000-04:00

As I was sitting on a bench today, next to the fountain in central that doesn't work, waiting for class to start, I was surrounded by an entire tour group. I overheard the tour leader showing all of ECU's prospective students and parents the Graham building and explaining that it was the geology building. And infact it is, but what really struck me was when he said, "Geology is a big major here at ECU." (Well I can't remember the wording now, but he basically said that a lot of people are Geology majors.) Which I wanted to stand up and refute it to the group of naive kids, because the fact is, in a school of 20,000, if I remember correctly there are 30 something students majoring in it.

Anyway, that's not my complaint. However, before I was surrounded by the tour group a studious young man walked by me on his way to class. I looked up at him as he walked past and noticed his shirt. It read: I is a kooledge Stooodent. And naturally it was a black shirt with white writing, as all those shirts are. But what really made me wonder is what would make someone want to buy a shirt like that. Do you walk by the rack in, what im guessing to be Hot Topic (since they sell all those ridiculous attempts to be witty shirts), and read the shirt, laugh to yourself because the mis-spelling and poor grammar have really busted out the humor and realized you had have it? And about the quips they try to put on there...why does your shirt have to be witty? (Not that it is, it's rather annoying actually) Is your personality not enough to show that you're witty, so instead you make up for it and buy a mainstream t-shirt and suddenly you're a riot and oh so clever, without ever opening your mouth?
I really hate the shirts that say, "I have nothing to wear"
I can't believe someone would waste money on such a pointless shirt. So really, is this the shirt you only wear when everything else is dirty, but you so perfectly matched the tank top underneath with it, along with your belt and ugly oversized hippy earrings? Because it appears that you have things to wear.
In my fashion class last semester, we did our last topic on the history of the T-shirt. And it was very interesting actually. We talked about how in the 60's the t-shirt became a form of expression and people would use it to protest and state their beliefs, which I find all good and dandy. But I don't find shirts that say, "I beat your mom at Mario Cart", "You looked better on Myspace", "That's not what you were saying last night" (which can all be purchased at www.Hottopic.com) funny. My mom doesn't play Mario Cart, Why would you have a shirt about myspace, you're that cool aren't you? And its always the most unattractive guys who wear shirts that say "That's not what you were saying last night." etc. So not only have these silly screen tees made a debauchery of what T-shirts used to stand for, they also show me that you have no taste or time when it comes to clothes. You clearly have the money to buy these shirts, so thats not the problem. They're not clever, nor funny, they waste my time because naturally you have to read what's on someones shirt, and just make you look bad. The shirts never fit well, are always semi-faded in a bad way because the wearer wears them so much and after wearing them once the message just doesnt hold the same stupid value it used to.
So take off your stupid screen tees because i don't need to see a shirt that says, You were never my boyfriend on it, because damn right I wasn't. I'm not saying you have to dress well, I'm just trying to save you some of the little dignity you have left.

(the only screen tee's I have respect for are the ones that come from bustedtees.com and because those are actally clever and funny, but I would still never buy one.)

On another topic of tees, I also hate ones that have had the store logo thrown up on it. I don't care that you got your shirt from Hollister. Cool, but you don't need to advertise, I already know you paid way too much for a shitty quality shirt. The only one I could respect is the one Chris and I made up, ABERCROMBIE AND FITCH 1947 I FUCKED YOUR MOM. which yes...borders on the the complaint above, but it would also be making a mockery of the stupid shirts they sell at Abercrombie. And naturally you would have to pay fifty dollars for it and I wouldn't buy it.

LIke, do we really have to do work?

2006-04-13T12:41:00.000-04:00

I don't know if it's because I go to ECU or maybe our generation is just getting dumber, but I swear I encounter more and more stupid people every day. So we'll look at classes, because they are a prime location to evaluate the Stupid Revolution.
Ways to tell that you're smarter than the kids in your class:
1. Do you have one of those people that complain loudly about every assignment given or that the teacher goes all the way up to the end of class? Oh God, we're in class for the whole fifty minutes today. Do these people not realize they are in college and there is work to be done and class to attend? Let's just complain a little more loudly next time.
2. Do you have one of those kids that has to answer every question, but most of the time is stating the obvious? Ok, so they answer every question, you would think they are smart, but when all they are doing is rearranging the words that the teacher just said and adding a period on the end and not a question mark. These people dont know what they are talking about and just hope everyone else thinks they do. In other words, these people just like to hear themselves talk.
3. Do you overhear other classmates complaining about how hard your Intro level class is after class? When all these classes consist of is taking notes, understanding basic concepts and being able to spit it back out on a test. Why its hard and they can't make A's is beyond me.
4. Do you hear that annoying girl talking to some equally annoying boy behind you before class starts and you want to strangle yourself because their conversation is so dense and filled with the overuse of the word "like".
5. Do you have kids in your english class who still can't grasp the idea of MLA format, so in turn your teacher has to spend multiple class days going over it and people still do it wrong? Uh, did we not learn MLA in highschool? I think we did. Ok great. Double spacing really isnt that hard to remember.
I thought you had to be somewhat intelligent to get into school, even if this is ECU. I'm sure there are dumb people at UNC. I think if you're dumb, you should just keep your mouth shut, then people won't realize you're severely mentally handicapped and will just think you're mysterious.
But finally, there is the entire breed of boys that are so low on the IQ scale that it's painful to be in their presense, thoses that dropped out, or don't really go to college, sit around trying to get laid by highschool girls still, spend all their parents money on drugs and past their time by getting arrested. And somehow, I got stuck going to highschool with a vast amount of them. They're the people that kill me the most. They are the epitome of fuck ups and giant losers and they ruin every place they show up that I'm at. These are the people that give me no hope on our generation. To be a complete bitch: they are a complete waste of space/time and a bunch of fat fuck ups.
Basically... I hate dumb people, if you can't understand that my joke was bad and then make fun of me for it, I don't want to talk to you.

What's Hood witcha. I got my Gat.

2006-04-12T02:04:00.000-04:00

I hate the people who drive up the hill specifically, but really anywhere, and blast their awful music. Newsflash retards, not everyone enjoys rap music. White and black people alike both feel the need to blast rap music. I don't ever see an asian blasting music and that's because they know better.
And really it doesnt matter that its rap music, any music being blasted is annoying. Especially when they drive by, windows down, seat leaned back, sunglasses on, and they are looking out their window to you, looking for afirmation of their coolness-because its then that they look even dumber. I just made really offended/you're a dumbass faces at them, in hopes of making them think twice about blasting their "Songs about Guns and Hos" cd again. (almost sounds like guns and roses there, that kind of excited me.)
But what really pisses me off is when its like 2 in the afternoon, I'm peacefully trying to take a four hour nap and asswhipe Mcwhipey decides to drive up the hill in his red car, park outside of Tyler, blast some god awful rap music and lean against his car, for about 20 minutes. I live in the back of the building, if hes in front and I can still hear every word that rich "gangster from the block" is saying, isn't it a bit loud? Wake me from my nap why dont you!?
My bet is, this kid doesnt go to school here, hes just trying to impress the ladies. Why else would you blast horrendous music and just lean against your car, waiting for the next girl to walk by. LAME.
So what I'm saying is this. Drive your car and drive it well. Don't blast music, especially rap, especially if you're white-because you look really dumb trying to rap along with it. Play your music loud enough to hear it through out the car, not through out the town. Don't think people think you are cool because you have a stereo and a car in which you can blast shitty music in, because they dont. The next asshole who wakes me up from my nap because of the shitfest hes throwing outside my dorm, is gonna get a slashed tired.

Hampsters are more livelier before they go in your ass

2006-04-11T01:05:00.000-04:00

I apologize for the lack of complaints. I've just been busy and complaint free. Well complaint free to the extent that what I have been complaining about wasn't good enough to constitute an entire post. At any rate, if you have any suggestions or requests to be complained about, leave a comment and I'll take it into consideration. Until then, if I can't come up with something good, I'm not going to post. And plus, I'm a busy girl, don't you know?

Fight Club

2006-04-07T14:39:00.000-04:00

(This is completely seperate from my complaint, but it involves the same night/place.)
Things I learned at PB's last night:
When the YMCA song comes on, only God knows why first of all, don't turn around to the random boy behind you and do it, because hes then going to ask your name and if you want to swing dance. Then when when I said I haven't since I was in sixth grade, he happily offered to teach me. To that my friends, I say no.

Also, when there is a stage on top of another stage, I should never attempt to leap onto the second stage, because naturally only I would miss the jump all together and smash my leg into it and fall backwards on top of the lower stage, all while being sober.

Anyway, I am avery undowntown kind of girl; I don't like clubs and I figured thats the only thing you can do downtown. Well when everyone told me they were going to PB's last night, I was hesitant at first, but they promised it wouldn't be like the Cavern or Cabanas, so I said ok. But there was one thing that was exactly the same; idiotic boys.
It starts with an unintentional glare, an accidental bump or a misinterpreted choice of words, and of course sufficient alcohol in their systems and before you know it a string of "FUCK's, SHIT's, MAN's, WHAT's..." comes flowing ever so incoherently out of their mouth. Then this instinctual raising of the shoulders and sticking their chest out like a chicken occurs, as if to make them look stronger. Then their "boys" step in to hold eachother back, while the one who got bumped is screaming something ridiculous and the other guy, usually not as drunk is like Uh? or if he is as drunk is just as happy to join in the clucking chicken fest. Those big bucking chickens.
Last night, we were all standing outside on the porch of PB's and I missed how it began, but probably innocently, Fraty McFratster feathers get all ruffled and hes gotta show McFratter whose the man around here. I, of course, am standing close by and screaming things like, "FUCK, ya man, SHIT, get it", in hopes of egging them on. There's nothing more than I would love to see than two khaki clad, sperry sporting, striped oxford wearing frat boys go at it. But with all these pretentious fights, nothing ever happens, the "boys" pull him off, buy him a beer and find him a stupid girl to convince to sleep with him.
For once, I want to see one of these boys go at it. I want less talk and more action. And then, thats exactly what I got afterwards. As we were standing in Chico's waiting for our taxi, some dude gets a bottle broken on his head and shoved, I think?, into the glass window of a store...well atleast something did. Now thats a little more than I'd expect, because this dude was really bleeding. But props for them for actually fighting it out.
So first off...when you go out and get drunk boys, don't try to be this macho guy and fight the next guy whose elbow slightly brushes yours as hes walking past. And if you have to be this dumbass, don't start your first sentence out with, "What the? Man, fuck you. I'm gonna fuck your shit up!" Because you better believe im gonna run up right there and watch you, egg you on, make fun of you endlessly, and hope that you get the ever living shit beat out of you. Stupid frat boys. Their good for one thing...entertainment.

Sex lies

2006-04-06T16:32:00.000-04:00

Dude # 1: Last night, I screwed her brains out, she was loving it.
Dude # 2: *High Five*
Girl #1: Oh really?
-----------------
Girl #1: Did you really have sex with him last night?
Girl #2: Sick, no! I bet you could practically braid his back hair.
Girl #1: Hmm.

Why do people feel the need to lie about people they have had sex with? I'm not saying in this scenario that the girl lied, I'm saying the boy lied. But it goes either way. I've had girls and guys lie to me about who they've had sex with.
First off, why go to the lenght of lying about who you had sex with? Why make up a fake story and date of when this happened? Most of the time, these liars bring up the story all on their own, it isnt prompted to them. So they must of thought of this story and thought of who they could tell and thought of what they could gain by telling this story. But what are you gaining by lying about this?
Secondly, the people always tell people that are friends with the said person they had sex with it. So naturally, if you lied about it, the friend is going to figure out and the said person is going to find out you're telling people you had sex with them.
Case in point: During junior year, a friend of mine went around telling people we had sex. Clearly I was virgin then...I wasn't boning anyone. So almost a year later, I find out he has told all of these people that we had sex, outraged I call him. And what do you think happens when I ask him about it? He lies and says he has no idea what people are talking about, but hmm... funny, several people told me. I don't care anymore that was a long time ago, but still... he lied about it originally and then lied to me about. I would have been happier if he just admitted to it and apologized.
So why are you lying? What are you getting out of this? When you tell me person after person that you've had sex with, I don't think you're this awesome person. I'm not like, "SHIT, people must really like you, you must be really attractive, WOW...you're awesome." I don't care what you're number is, unless youre a boy, cus I dont want syphillis.
I'm more than willing to listen to funny sex stories and some crazy thing that boy did last night, like trying to give you a rim job or something, but if its all lies, I dont want to hear it.
Most of the time, by the end of the conversation I know if you just lied to me. Or I go make one phone call and I found out the truth, if it seemed fishy. Basically, what I'm saying is, if you ever lied to me about someone you had sex with and you wanted some sort of recognition for it, I hope I didn't give it to you and that I know and I went and told everyone that you told, that it wasnt true. Because thats the kind of bitch I am. So stop lying for goodness sakes. Spend your time getting laid not making up stories about how you got laid. Dumbass.

Autoresponse: I'm an asswhipe

2006-04-05T13:02:00.000-04:00

YOU: "Hey, how are you doing"
10 seconds later: Auto response from Girlorboywhousuallytalkstoyoutoomuch: I'm doing the Big M, check you later.

OH. Well. I see. Too good to say, "Hey can't talk right now." You know, yesterday you were all about talking to me, to the point that I wanted to slit my throat. You wanted me to come out with you, most likely so you can get my drunk and take advantage of me, but no, now you're too good to say anything to me.

This happens to everyone all the time, it pisses some off more than others, but either way it is just rude. The person you tried to talk to, you obviously went to the effort of clicking their box and typing something in, they could take the effort to say I got to go. But no...no...they instead ignore you, close your AIM box and she/he puts up an away message about going out with Sarah and Lindsey/Mike and Jim to get really "fucked up" because "fuck this test I have tomorrow". But you know what, I don't give a shit about Sarah, Lindsey, Mike or Jim or the fact that you're going to fail your test...GASP...I give a shit that I attempted to talk to you and you blatantly ignored me. It's called COMMON COURTESY.

So next time my, I don't really care about talking to you-I'm just bored, "Hey, what's up" goes ignored, I'll think twice about IMing you again.

(Another complaint idea given by Anthony. Thanks boo.)

The Sweaty Desperation

2006-04-04T21:42:00.000-04:00

(First of all the idea for this post goes to Anthony. Thanks anf :) )

We've all seen them, you may even be one of them. As soon as it gets warm out, boys and girls alike come out and attempt to attract the opposite...or same sex in ridiculous ways. We all want tans and some, who must be crazy, like to play sports with their friends, so when its nice out, its a great excuse to skip class and hang around outside. But the great lenghts people go to show themselves off is astounding.
There I am, walking from Tyler to go to some dreadfully boring class, most likely Geology, it's a sunny day and as usual I'm stuck in class all day, but there they are, strategically placed boys playing football on the lawn and girls completely "oblivious" to the boys, lying on the grass in bikinis.
Granted we are really the only dorm around here that has lawn space to do anything on, but there is also a HUGE field at the bottom of the hill, am I wrong? But no, these multiple boys and multiple girls share this tiny space and I truly doubt they are concerned about playing football or getting a tan. How I know this is simple: The boys take off their shirts and prance around with their football and the girls lean on their elbows sticking their small titties out. I've watched it and been abhorred! It's pathetic really.
I wouldn't approach a guy like that, although I don't mind watching them from my window with Brittany as I jump around in my underwear, I mean?! uh. Anyway, I wouldn't talk to a guy that feels he has to show himself off to get attention, he almost falls under the catergory of the "metrosexual" in his self consciousness/or full of himselfness, hes just a little more manly than the metrosexual...or maybe that's just what they want us to think? And one of those girls, usually surrounded with their other girls, carefully smearing tanning oil on them and making sure not to miss the tit region, must either think too much of themselves or wants to attract scheazy guys. Because I think if a guy was to approach one of them, he'd have to be a scheaze or drunk.
So here it is people...its extremely nice out, I know. But there is a giant grassy field at the bottom of the hill where everyone would have plenty of space to do what they want. And if you are to hang outside Tyler, I understand, it's convenient, but keep a shirt on, lay out there with your homework and some clothes on? Stop looking so desperate...because in the end, if I'm laughing at you, I'm sure others are too, well I can hope.

"This is a time for politics" suck it G.W.B.

2006-04-04T01:36:00.000-04:00

I first off want to apologize for that atrocious complaint I posted today. It was god awful, I shouldn't allow myself to write such crap. However, I will not delete it because people do need to know that they look like jackasses with homemade tears. Moving on: Random thoughts of the day.

Ross contributed a complaint idea for me, being I don't have enough hatred to write a page on it, I will just say this... We are both sick of the stupid "ECU 2009's, UNC 2009, NCSTATE 2009...etc.." Great, you're at said school, awesome you have ambition to graduate in time. Do we all really need to be reminded? If we're your friend, we probably know what school you're attending and we probably realize that your graduation year should be 2009. But thank you for stating the obvious, its always welcome.

That was uh one hell of a tornado we had today, lasted a grand total of 30 minutes and let me just say, during those 30 minutes I was scared to death.

That research paper I questioned about...I finished it and its definitely A quality.

I would like to say thank you to Caitlin Burch for being a religious reader of this blog, it gives me purpose...I mean?

The Spin Doctors are playing at Barefoot on the Mall in a few weeks and well I'm just kind of excited. I don't know any other songs by them, but I can promise you that I'll be singing "Little Miss Can't Be Wrong" as loud as I possibly can.

Emergency Hospital waiting rooms are a death trap waiting to happen. I got to spend three lovely hours sitting in one yesterday and one hour was by myself. There were babies crying, people with bloody wounds and worst of all they were playing FOX NEWS on every TV the entire time. I resorted to putting Zachary on and tuning out the overbearing static of crap.

This isn't 1985 anymore, put away your sissors.

2006-04-03T17:23:00.000-04:00

What is this new fascination with ripping holes in your jeans, girls? and maybe boys too. I saw the worst one yet today. Walking from Bate, a girl passed me with very percisely ripped jeans. There was a huge square hole half way down her thigh and then there was an identical hole on the other jean. Both of these holes were about 3 inches wide.. Then she carefully skipped an inch, and cut out another perfect strip on both legs that was about 2 inches wide. Immediately following after her came another girl with a bad choice in cutting.
Real holes are one thing. I love my jeans with the huge hole in them, but that hole got there because they are 4 years old. I didn't buy a new pair of jeans and cut an obvious sluttly slit through it. I don't know if they think this is some sort of fashion statement, because the only thing its saying to me is, "I'm trying to be sexy by putting big holes in my jeans around the crotch area, but really I look like a giant dumb ass."
I also hate the ones where they cut out the knee caps and they cut them both the same. If you're going to cut one, cut the other one somewhere else atleast. The one cool thing about ripped clothing is the strings that start getting stretched across, which come from natural tears. But not from these pathetic attempts to look cute. Instead, you can tell that these girls just cut their jeans, probably the night before, when A Martha Stewart redecorating trip surged through them. But you can tell because there are no strings coming out. Atleast try to make your holes look legit, wash them once or twice, pull out the strings...ANYTHING TO MAKE YOU LOOK LESS FOOLISH.
So if you haven't gotten the picture, I hate the holes. So if you see anyone going at their jeans with a pair of sissors, snatch out of their hands and stab them in the face with it...or just put it away.

I know this complaint kind of sucked your balls, but I had a really mean up here that I wrote today, then I realized it was just TOO mean. So I replaced it with this trash.

Let me just scream at you online real fast

2006-04-01T21:48:00.000-05:00

"I can't believe you did that to me!" "You deserved it, you two cent whore." "Uh, I'm not the one with crabs!" "Whatever, bye." Autoresponse from asshole you just had a stupid aim fight with: You know, I really hate those two faced girls, that say one thing and do another. Why don't you just go blow somebody, eh? Two hours later: "Is that about me!?" "No, bye."

Here we go people, classic moments in everyone's lives. Whether, you just happened to read someone's away message and it said something like that and you all of a sudden got invited into their childish argument, or you may even be guilty of having aim fights and putting up away messages like that. Whatever it may be, I'm here to show you that if you resort to fighting online and leaving away messages about it, you're pathetic and childish.
First off, fights on the phone are bad as it is. The other person gives you an air of sarcasm. You don't get to say what you want. They think one thing, you think the other. But let's push it a little farther, shall we. Now, I admit, I have had fights online. More frequent in my middle school days and even into early highschool. Since then though, they have been few and I try to avoid them. But there are many who still have fights online and I get the joy of hearing about them, or just reading about them. If you're actually fighting about something, it must be some what important, and if its important, shouldn't you just make the effort to ATLEAST pick up a phone, if not go talk to them in person.
But fine, I realize that maybe sometimes arguments stem from random things and this is the only way you can talk about it, but do you really need to resort to writing a novel on your away message about the other person? And when you write about it, do you have to have the ability of a five year old to be vague? "Ya, that girl who I'm best friends with, she has blond hair, and is 5'3. I hate her." When, if you had to write an away message expressing your grief you could write, I hate Jenn Flaherty. But no, not only do you have your fights online, you write away messages about it. Wow, youre upset with this person, that isnt uncommon, please go ahead and tell me all about in your profile, so I can know the updates of how you and this person are.
But here's the real kicker, when the person that has been written about in the away message asks if that was about them, when it clearly is, the other person lies. And lies badly. If you're going to be the idiot to write something about the other person all in attempt just so they see it, or to show the world that you're an overreactive cry baby, atleast man up to it and say, "ya you crack whore that was about you and your loose ass cunt."
So finally, someone could say, Robin-just dont read people's away messages. Well if I didnt do that, then I wouldn't have a way to past the time and have ideas of what to complain about next. But it isnt the fact that I read them, its the fact that you did it initially, and its there for all the world to see.
So suck it up, just because your asshole boyfriend/girlfriend has pissed you off, don't let the whole world see it, just because you want your bf/gf to. Suck on that, bitches.

It's a MMMbop and gone.

2006-04-01T00:12:00.000-05:00

Random thoughts and events of what now is yesterday:

The man that is the manager maybe director of the dining halls, maybe just Todd, is a total pedaphile. If not that, a serial killer. Just look at him. He's creepy and when I went walking past him on the Hill today, he gave me the creepiest, scheaziest smile ever. I secretly liked it.

People at the gym get all in a huff and puff if you're not off of the eliptical at the exact time it said you would be. Heaven forbid I go 30 seconds over before they start asking questions. Sweetheart, the fat on your ass isn't going to come on off in the 30 second interval that I took up. So whipe that sweat off your mustache and calm down.

Why does birth control make you all emotional? Today was the first pill of my pack and I'm watching sex and the city, crying like a loser in my dorm room. God, I'm pathetic.

ECU kids were down to fifteen days of class.

I have a research paper due on Tuesday that I haven't even begun to get the research for. Will I successfully pull another A paper out of my ass in 3 available days? Only time will tell, but I'm thinking... yes.

Finally, as I was walking to the Galley tonight around 1030 out of shear boredom, I thought I saw our neighbors Erin and Jess sitting at a table. I heard one of them yell, what I thought to be, "Robin!". So in response, I waved and said, "OH hey, thank god people I know." Come to find out, it was some Asian girl I had never seen and some gothic-ie girl smoking a cigarette, which I didnt realize till I was face to face with them. Then I had to explain.

Shit man, I was sooo Drunk!

2006-03-31T16:01:00.000-05:00

I know I said I would do a complaint a day and a random thoughts post for the day, but I just had to add this complaint on as well, half way to procrastinate before I spend my Friday afternoon in the library.
I was riding the Gold bus today, on the way to the gym. Yes, I ride the bus to the gym. Do you see the irony? Anyway, so I was sitting in between some kid with his ipod on and then a bunch of guys talking about alcohol. And they reminded me drinking alcohol makes them men. They didn't turn to me and say this, but I could tell by their predictable comments and casuality in their voice when boasting, that they thought they were special and real men.
I am talking about when guys have to recount how much they drank the night before or on some particular incident. Or how alcohol does or doesnt make them be a certain way. Why is it that a guy can tell you the exact amount of beer, jello shots and aristocrat shots he had one night a month ago, but can't remember what you said five minutes ago? Then why when talking with their friends do they have to talk about how much they had?
Why can't the conversation only state, I got really drunk last night and I macked on this sweet bitch. When in reality, you know the guy blacked out, pissed himself and pissed everyone else off, and isnt allowed to return to that house ever again, but thats not important.
I find that girls do it too. "I drank a whole fifth last night!" "I put away an entire case on my own." WOW. That's awesome, did all of your make up smear off too and your hair get really frizzy and you hit on some really ugly kid you wouldnt usually talk to?
Why do people have to comment on how much they drank. Cool, you went out and drank, I'm down with that and I don't care that you got drunk. Thats what drinking is for anyway, isn't it? But why recant how much you drank? When you tell me that you had 13 beers, 5 jello shots, smoked 2 bowls and then finished it off with something out of a random bottle, that doesn't make me think you're the man, it makes me think you're a few weeks away from a beer belly and alcoholism.
So with Friday night only hours away from starting, remember when you're doing keg stands, emptying cans and trying to get laid, that tomorrow I only wanna hear if you got laid by that gross girl with herpes or not, not how much you could put away.
A quote I heard once sums this all up : "Real men (or women) don't count."

I can't hang out later, I have a hair and nail appointment, followed by a tanning session.

2006-03-31T12:23:00.000-05:00

When it comes to sexuality, I don't care what you are or who you do. You could enjoy humping dogs and as long as the dog was cool with it, so am I. You could marry a gay, asian porn star and I'd respect it. But when it just comes to guys, there are many things that if they do, I wouldn't consider dating you. And it all stems from being Metrosexual. Now, I like the word sex, and the word sexual and sexuality. I also like most words that are attached to sexuality. I like the metro, I rode it in London and when I go to New York this summer, I plan to ride it there and go to the Metropolitan, but the two words "Metro" and "Sexual" are two that I'll never come to appreciate.
All of the following are traits of metrosexuality and of a boy that I would not date. Just to clarify, since I have come to find out that some people don't know what metrosexuality is, it is when a boy, who is not gay, has many gay tendencies and generally has a stick stuck up there ass and only dates skinny, skanky blondes. (So I guess I wouldnt have a chance with them anyway :) )
One: If you straighten, style, or gel your hair to perfection everyday. I know some boys that spend more time on their hair then I do and what does it look like? Exactly as it would if they just woke up and quickly ran some gel through it. I know some that freak out if you touch their hair. I know some who have highlighted their hair. I rather a boy, not shower and not style his hair over a boy who squeals if you mess up a strand of it.
Two: If you go to a tanning bed. Now pale, pasty boys are not attractive. But boys that have clearly visited the tanning bed=very UNattractive. First off, I have no respect for tanning beds, as I have voiced many times, but I understand if girls go there. If they want to get cancer from a box, thats their prerogative. But a boy who goes to a tanning bed, is too self conscious, making him too full on himself, cancerous and if not full on himself, lacking self-esteem. And we all know how I feel about people who don't have self-esteem. I hate them, only to add to their decreasing self-worth. A boy should get a tan if he went to the beach or if he was doing HOT manual labor outside, not from ultra violet rays in a box.
Three: Wearing tight fitted pants, also a trait of "emo" or attempting to be in a band boys. ( I didn't know the emo look was still in.) I don't need to see your small package bulging from a pair of jeans I should be wearing. No these pants dont make your ass look better, or your legs. It simply makes you look blind.
Four: In addition the tight jeans, they spend entirely too much time getting dressed. There is a difference between dressing well and trying too hard. A boy in a sweater with collars coming out of it or a button up shirt is always sexy, but a boy with all that, with a belt that perfectly matches the striping in the shirt underneath the sweather, that also has its collar popped, along with perfectly shined shoes, well fitted jeans, and sauve hair makes me want to scream: I'm the girl here! Throw on a polo and some jeans, let's go.
In the end, I find these boys to be also lacking in the brains department. When they excel in dressing, tanning care and a mental list of all their fifty hair gels, there just doesnt seem to be a lot of room for smarts. And with their lacking IQ, comes this high level of astuteness. You're so fucking full on yourself and the next hot blond bitch you're going to pick up, that you don't realize you're a flaming asshole.
Metrosexual guys=Ultra lame, Ultra ugly. If you're a gay guy and do this... I have nothing but love for you :). Bring on the guys who just don't care.

"They are dangerous things, those test tube experiments"-Bo Newsome

2006-03-30T17:29:00.000-05:00

Musings of this beautiful day:

I was pretty sure that jean shorts, also known as Jorts, had been outlawed, or atleast consciously gone out of style, but I must be mistaken, because I saw a boy walking up the hill sporting a pair of them. Sick.

How did that boy who lives in Aycock purchase that ambulance? Why would you want an ambulance and why would you be allowed to drive one, especially one that says,"Romeo is Bleeding", on the side of it?

Who are these boys that like laying on blankets outside with their girlfriend and more importantly, where do I find them?

I was looking at the nutritional value of the food we eat, its on the dining hall website, and unless you eat uncooked, organic food (which is fine), you're eating about 21 grams of fat, 1500 mg of sodium and 400 calories PER ITEM! I'll stick to my salads.

That is all, thank you for not interrupting.

Girl, Interrupted

2006-03-30T12:48:00.000-05:00

Sometimes we have to unfortunately find ourselves having conversations with girls. They're whiny, inept, talk about meaningless things and more often than not interruptive. And I am guilty of all those things, unfortunately even the last one, although not as bad as some.
If you're a guy, you put up with the bullshit all because you have the chance of getting laid, but us girls when listening to our own kind, we have nothing to gain but useless information and striking boredom.
Now naturally, all girls arent this way and I attempt to weed out the annoying ones, dramatic ones, and attention needy ones, which doesnt leave many, but it leaves me with the girls I have for friends now, who are amazing none the less...come on Caitlin Burch, greatest girl alive. However, I still prefer the company of boys over girls. No offense ladies.
It isn't the trite things girls like to talk about that bothers me, most of the time I'll have a lot to contribute in a useless conversation, but it is the inability to wait your turn to speak, that many girls lack.
Scenario: I'll be telling a story of how last weekend I was climbing this mountain, ran into this hot park ranger and we got it done in the bushes, but before I can even get to the part about meeting HottiemcRanger, some other girl has jumped in already saying, "Yea one time I went hiking and I fell down and"...and at this point I have zoned out and stopped listening. If you're unwilling to listen to what I have to say, then I am unwilling to listen to your less important story.
We all went to kindergarden and we all learned how to raise our hand and wait our turn to speak. Now, I'm not asking someone to raise their hand when they want to interject or even question when to say something, I'm just saying, let me get to a good point in my story, where you can ask a question or contribute something knowledgable. Don't jump into my rant, story, whatever, and contribute something about yourself. Because more often than not, their story lasts twice as long as yours, doesn't appeal to you, and by the time they are done, you've forgotten what you were talking about and so has everyone else.
Wait your turn bitches, the story you have to tell about how you burned some of your hair when you were straightening it can certainly wait.

No one likes a ginger kid

2006-03-29T15:25:00.000-05:00

And to finish this day off, before my studying and papering commences, some brief musings of my day:

First off-Does anyone else hate Anderson Cooper?

Boys who wear visible wife beaters, no matter how in shape or not, should be shot.

Using your textbook as a weight to work out with turned out to be a good idea.

Someone burned down a dorm room in Clement today. Nuts.

Apparently it is acceptable now to use electric shock therapy on children who misbehave. UH? Good thinking New York.

Journey tickets for the fourth of july walnut creek concert go on sale this week. Uh hell yes.

and finally, for the SGA elections, I didn't vote for the secretary on Ticket #2 because she looked like a dirty skank and no one likes that.

Tomorrows Complaint: Thugged out White guys.

Alpha Sig Trigonometry

2006-03-29T12:39:00.000-05:00

There you are, mindlessly walking to class and minding your own business, when you see them, standing there with a pile of little orange paper squares in their hand, attacking anyone and everyone who walks by. Whether you're on the Hill, central campus, at Todd, West end, or anywhere in between, there is someone handing out flyers, that I neither care about or read. Does anyone read them? I quickly grab it away from the person and shove it in my pocket, before I've even noticed what it was about it.
I don't need to know about Tri Sig's upcoming keggar/blood drive that they are throwing to raise money for starving kids in eastern Ethiopia or the free six inch sub I could get from Miami subs if I go there between the hours of 2pm and 5 pm and fill out some silly questionaire, that will "Only take a minute". I don't even like subs all that much.
My real complaint is not that I hate flyers, its the people that hand out their flyers that bother me. There is absolutely no way to get around them, unless you are in a large group of people, where then you can duck behind someones back pack and run past them, but otherwise you're stuck with a waste of paper. And if you make eye contact with the Handee, its all over-you're getting a flyer and there it goes in your pocket to forget about.
But what I hate the most, beyond the flyers and the people that hand them out, is the effects of the flyer. You go to wash your clothes and are carelessly throwing them in washing machine, only worried about how many clothes you can shove in there before they wont really be getting washed anymore. Then when you return, staring you in the face is thousands of little remnants of Tri Sig's invite to their drunken blood drive for Ethiopian kids. Not only did they waste my time, they ruined my clothes.

(I only give props to the man who handed me a wings over greenville flyer. It was outside of Flanagan one day. He handed me a yellow flyer and said, Come to the Student Buddhist Meeting this week. When I opened it, it was a menu for Wings Over Greenville, now I may be the only student of ECU who doesnt like WOG, but I had a lot more respect for it that day. I turned around and laughed with the kid and went to class.)

Big Bucking Chicken

2006-03-29T09:26:00.000-05:00

I decided to start a blog because all of my complaints will not fit comfortably in my profile. The new AOL Triton decided that you should have very little profile space, leaving me with very little complaint space. So I came here, in hopes of writing well scripted, humorous complaints, that will hopefully offend some and make others laugh. Or atleast give you something to do instead of checking everyone's away messages incessantly.
This will not be a blog in which I will write stories of my day like, "Today Steven told me that he liked my shirt. What does this mean? I think Steven likes me, but I'm not sure, he did just knock up Mary. Why is my life so hard? Gah!" It well be left to just complain in and write extremely random thoughts. But with that all said, complaints will soon be posted, but I must get my ass to class.